Mike of Korea

The one about leisure

2011-12-17T10:41:00.000+09:00

When Elder Scrolls 3, Morrowind, came out, I remember playing sometimes 15 hours straight. It was the first game like that I had ever experienced, and it was completely blowing me away. Before that, all I had ever played really was Age of Empires.

That wasn't exactly good for me, though, playing long stretches at a time, so when Elder Scrolls 4, Oblivion, came out, I promised myself to play only two hours maximum at a time.

I lied.

I ended up playing Oblivion hours on end, too, because it was just so cool and so much better than Morrowind, I honestly couldn't get enough of it. I even bought a new television to make the Oblivion experience all the better.

So now Skyrim has come out, Elder Scrolls 5. It's compelling just like the others in the series, but for some reason, I have not sat on the XBox hour after hour playing it. I have played for a couple hours then gone off to do other things, all without threatening myself or setting alarm clocks or anything more extraordinary than simply glancing at the clock and saying, "Hey, I want to go outside now." Maybe I'm finally growing up? Unlikely, but maybe.

The graphics and scripting and character interactions are the best ever in Skyrim. For the first few days of play, I really didn't do much except wander around the game world enjoying how beautiful it was, how the butterflies flew, how the grass waved in the breeze, how people chopped wood and smithed blades, as well as how the occasional sabertooth cat could slice me in two with one swipe. Fascinating.

But now I'm down to business and getting into the actual meat of gameplay. I got married in the game world so I could have a steady and daily flow of income from my spouse. That was never possible before. There are children in the game, too. Elder Scrolls games never had children characters before. A lot of the grooviest stuff must have come from the game makers' experience with Fallout 3, because there are aspects of Skyrim that remind me of Fallout, and some of the voice actors were also in Fallout.

Games like this are little escapes from reality, and that's not a bad thing. It's a hell of a lot better than watching television. TV as entertainment is a total waste of time. Everyone needs to have and enjoy meaningful leisure on a regular basis. My job affords me the time and opportunity to engage in several different leisure activities; Skyrim is just one.

I hope that you, too, have something fulfilling and fun and challenging to do when you are not working to make a living, be it reading great books, building things, fixing things, playing games, hiking, biking, or whatever. Make sure you create leisure for yourself regularly. It's what helps us stay sane in this crazy world.

All the photos here are swiped from the Internet because I cannot find my Morrowind screen shots, and I never played Oblivion or Skyrim on anything other than the XBox where you can't take screenshots.

The one about improvement and attitude

2011-10-29T11:26:00.000+09:00

Before I came to Korea I had used chopsticks on and off and could at least get the food to my mouth without dropping it, well, most of the time anyway. Over the years I have lived here, my proficiency with chopsticks has improved off the scale, yet I noticed something a few years ago. I don't hold chopsticks the same way Koreans do, yet I can use chopsticks just as well as they can. In that little observation, a whole philosophy of learning appeared before my eyes. Proficiency lies not in technical imitation, but in the extent of usage. Tell someone to reach a goal, give him a pointer or two, and let him go. Given the opportunity to practice the skill, they will arrive at the goal, though maybe not the same way you had intended nor with the same style you expected.

Learning English (or any language) works the same way. However, here in Korea, many are obsessed with technical imitation which ultimately defeats most of them long before they gain suitable proficiency in the language. My observation isn't some novel approach to the whole English learning endeavor, because I have heard experienced English teachers say over and over that improvement comes with usage. Speak more, write more, listen more, read more, and your language skills will improve. However, instead of creating an abundance of opportunities for real and genuine use of English, many universities and communities in Korea discourage such things in favor of classroom rote and mimicry. For example, I have online conversation classes in the 3D virtual world of Second Life. Many of my learners appreciate that this environment compels them to use English extensively whether in my class setting or elsewhere in the online environment. The virtual reality allows a much more realistic use of the language than they find in a brick & mortar classroom. They can not only meet native English speakers as well as people from any number of other countries who use the English language within the virtual world, they can also exchange real and personal ideas and opinions in the common language and receive back the same from others. Usage improves skill. It's true with a hedge trimmer, it's true with pastry, it's true with language. However, our school is closing its presence in Second Life and enforcing the rule that language education must take place as though it were no different than a math, science, or history class. English is data to be learned, not a language to be used.

Another hindrance to learning, at our school anyway, is that the English speaking teaching staff are crowded into mass offices with many teachers per office. My students find it uncomfortable to come to my office, because there are eleven other teachers sitting there listening to them, and I am in the least populated office. It's intimidating, to the low level learner especially, to visit a teacher in this environment. The university thinks it's the teachers who just want private or semi-private offices for our own comfort, but the reality is, it's the students who suffer from this secretarial pool setting where they are too nervous to come see their teacher because it's like stepping on a stage in front of an audience. Nobody likes their problems or academic difficulties on display like that, especially if their language skills are minimal. It's like seeing your priest or rabbi for a personal problem while a dozen strangers are listening in. The university is discouraging student-English teacher interaction by denying the student-teacher privacy all other teachers at the university are favored with. If I were a student, I would not come see my teacher in a room full of strangers unless I absolutely had to, but that's what we see not just here but all across the realm of the Korean English education system. Our students don't come by our offices to talk; they come for incidental reasons. They come to take make-up tests. They come to turn in a late homework. They come to ask a quick question about when their midterm exam is. They come to bring a can of Pocari Sweat as a gift. They do not come to consult with the teacher to help them speak English better, because in a room of many other teachers, you cannot speak freely, you have to lower your voice, you are distracted. The Korean education system once again rallies to assert its time-tested recipe for failure.

There are thousands and thousands of native English speakers living in Korea, yet the schools and universities ignore us as a resource. We are just foreigners and workers who need to be controlled and constricted. Many of us have degrees in subjects that allow us to teach those subjects either in high schools or universities, yet the Koreans opt to use us only in "conversation" classes which meet once a week, if there isn't one of their innumerable holidays in the way of that. Unless we have fluency in Korean language, we are not allowed to teach our subjects which defeats the whole reason we are supposedly here in Korea in the first place, to provide opportunities for them to use English in real-life situations. The Koreans started this 'learn English' venture and invited the thousands and thousands of us here to help them fulfill it while at the same time tying our hands behind our backs, gagging us, and generally ensuring that we will not get too comfortable in their country. Some teachers stick it out because there are no jobs back home worth taking. Some stick it out because they believe there is no problem, that people like me are simply exaggerating Korean ineptitude. Some, though, just get sick of the hypocrisy and lip service to education and go where their contributions will be appreciated.

Koreans amaze me in many ways. They are obviously a long-established homogenous people. Their nation is so old that no language has survived that is related to Korean. That's pretty cool. Their general outlook on life and society can be thought-provoking and even admirable. It's their inflexibility that also amazes me, however. Their reticence to create or to innovate is holding them back too much. I love Korea, and I don't say that flippantly. Sure, I get irritated with the nuisances of daily life here, but so do native Koreans; when all is said and done, though, and I'm sitting at home with my cat on my lap and warm cup of tea in my hands, I can reflect and honestly say that I do love Korea. It's not from any malice that I bring up the serious inadequacies of the Korean approach to language education. It's because I know they can do better. It's because I know English is crucial to success in the modern world and I want every Korean to succeed. If Koreans don't come to grips with how language is learned and implement changes necessary to ensure the common language takes root in their country, they will not be nearly as successful as they could be. Korea, we are here for you, but if you don't change your attitude, we might not stay.

The one about garbage bins

2011-10-04T11:50:00.001+09:00

Back in the States, I always just dumped my food waste in with my regular household waste, but here in Korea, they use these little buckets for food waste. The lining is slatted to allow liquid waste to pass through so you can dispose of it in the waste water system and the solid food waste you can... well, I really don't know what to do with the solid food waste. Some apartment houses have special containers out near the trash collection area just for food waste, but our apartment house doesn't have that, so I end up draining my food waste and simply tossing it in with the regular trash much as I have always done my whole life.

The other day the old lady who, with her elderly husband, kind of acts as the overseer of the building came ringing my doorbell at 8:30 in the morning. I usually don't answer the door at 8:30 since I'm more than likely still in my underwear. Each apartment has a video camera on the doorbell; I looked at the monitor and saw it was the old lady, so I slipped on some pants and answered the door. She stood there telling me about these garbage buckets and something something "go bring you one" something something. I couldn't really understand what she was saying, but I think the gist was "if you need one of these buckets [she was holding one up for me to see] I'll go and get you one." She can hardly get up and down the stairs here, so I might have gotten mixed up on that bit. She might have been telling me to go get one. However, I already have one, but I don't know what more to do with it. There is a special truck that comes by and empties these garbage containers at buildings that have them, but since our building doesn't have one, I'm not sure what to do. Should I just take my little bin out there and hope nobody steals it? Who would steal a garbage bin? You never know, but these 2-dollar bins are small enough to walk off with unnoticed.

It's a good idea to separate food garbage from regular trash. It keeps down vermin and the collected material can be used for composting. I'm sure the collectors earn money from farmers for most if not all of it. Maybe I'll start investigating this more, though not sure anyone in my building will understand me. I can order food in a restaurant and go shopping, use taxis, and read most posted signs around town, but my Korean language skills are abysmal for getting spoken information. Maybe I need to try anyway, just because it's the right thing to do. Isn't it funny how something as mundane as garbage can compel us to change the way we think?

The one about waiting in line

2011-09-29T09:25:00.003+09:00

Every year when I visit America, something rubs me the wrong way so bad that I have to respond with passion. This year it is that stupid way Americans stand in line.

This past summer I spent a month and a half in America. One day at Wal-Mart in Bay City, Michigan, I approached the self check-out area and saw an empty station. There was a woman and her child standing in the area, well back from the self check-out stations, but the woman made no move toward the empty station, so I walked up to it. A few seconds later I hear this muttering, "He saw me standing here..." I turned and after a few choice words, we argued, and I told her off because IF she actually were waiting in line, she shouldn't have been standing 15 feet away. I'm not happy that I lost my cool, but sometimes these people have to hear how stupid they are or else they'll never know.

During one of my motorcycle trips around Michigan, I stopped at a Dairy Queen in Grayling, and while I sat on my motorcycle eating a cone, I snapped pictures of patrons coming up to the DQ and standing in line.

When I was in line earlier, I stood right behind the person in front of me, and when she had received her order, she turned around to walk away and shot me a look that said, "What is wrong with you?" I was 2 feet behind her, which seemed completely normal to me. To her, that was way too close for comfort.

Americans grow up with distance between them. Our houses are usually not abutting the neighbors (except maybe in older crowded cities). We also grow up scared to death somebody will touch us. At Wal*Mart, on this same trip, a woman brushed by me, literally her shirt brushed my shirt, and at her reaction I instinctively flinched because she turned suddenly on me and raised her arms and said, "Oh my god, I'm so sorry!" At first I had no idea on earth what was happening and why this woman was frantically trying to appease me. She proceeded to apologize more specifically for "bumping into" me (!)

All the while she's apologizing, I'm thinking about my last 14 years in Korea where bumping and pushing are just part of daily life. She had no idea that her little brush of my shirt was literally nothing compared to what I'm used to.

Americans have conditioned themselves to need as much space as possible, both physically and psychologically. The concept of personal space is real, but I think Americans take if way too far. Humans have no real reason so keep such distance from each other. We are all in life together; we are all related.

Distance does not create community. Closeness creates community. If America is to become a real society, a peaceful, caring society, this notion of huge personal space has to vanish. Get close to your neighbor. Stand near each other in line. Reach out and touch a stranger to show that you're no threat, that distance is not necessary. Use your body to spread the message of peace and love for your fellow human beings by making your personal space as small as possible.

The one about Venus and stuff

2011-09-29T08:45:00.000+09:00

Several years ago, in 2004, I started a search for solar filters for my binoculars so that I could watch the transit of Venus. It was not easy! If you live in Korea, you know how nearly impossible it is to get specialized items, so you can imagine that in 2004 it was even harder. However, I eventually found a little astronomy club in Seoul that ran a shop for that sort of thing and I got my lens filters. They worked great!

Unfortunately, the transit of Venus took place for us in Korea late in the day, so it would be visible only during sunset. It was also on a work day. I told the hagwon owner where I worked what was going on, that the transit was a rare event we would probably only see once more in our lifetimes. I also suggested that since I had the binoculars and the filters, the middle school children might be interested in the phenomenon, too. We could talk about it and then maybe look up information about Venus. Hagwon owners are notoriously anti-education, and lest you think that it is strange for educational institutions to be anti-education, let me remind you that hagwons are for-profit businesses and are run as such. Not only did the hagwon owner say no, emphatically, he forbade me to go outside during work to see the transit of Venus. Of course, I went outside anyway, and some of the students came with me to see this rare event for themselves. I'm a teacher; I'm not a businessman specializing in education for profit. The business of education in Korea gets in the way of education all the time here. This was just one example that I experienced, a rather glaring example of why Koreans don't learn anything. They are some of the most ignorant and ill-informed people on the face of earth. They start out with curiosity just like anyone else, but the business of education, that reach for the almighty won, squashes curiosity in favor of the ruts that lead to company jobs and million-dollar apartments in Gangnam. Don't ever tell me that Koreans are better learners than Americans. The only thing Koreans do better is memorize formulas, equations, and facts. Americans go outside and see the world, experience the universe, learn for the sheer joy of learning whether it makes them rich or not.

2011-06-22T17:13:00.000+09:00

Everything is finished! The students have all had their final one-on-one interviews with me, and all the grades have been posted, the absences entered into the university system, and my semester portfolio turned in. The students have two weeks to contest their grades. Two weeks? Yes, in Korea, a tiny country where almost every house has high speed internet access they still give students two weeks to contest their grades. Usually, if they want to contest what they got, they'll do it right away. So far no one has ... oh wait. One student wrote me this email:

Hello!

Last semester I'm happy to listen your lecture.

I enjoyed talking with you and many students.

However, I saw my conversation grade yesterday.

I thought that my grade is a little low.

And I heard that in absolute evalutation many students get good grade.

Is everything left to your own discretion?

Why did I got grade B+?

Please tell me~ㅠ_ㅠ

Would you upgrade my score?

I really need your consideration!

If I get A0 , I can take classes more. It is school rugulation.

The reason is that I complete a course in teacher education.

It means that I have two major subject.

I have to take lesson more than other people.

I need to take three required subjects next semester.

If I give grades 4.0 , I can do it.

But I can't do it. I got B+, so I lack point a little.

Please consider it again~^,^

My guiding criterion in that class was how much they talked. It's a conversation course after all, and the more they talked, the higher their grade. This young lady didn't talk even enough for a B+, but I was generous. Now, I can guarantee that if I don't up her grade to A, there will be repercussions that could eventually result in my contract not being renewed, That's how they do it here. Korea is not known for its high academic standards, and every semester we have to decide whether our academic integrity is more important than our jobs. I have learned from several mistakes that the job is more important. It's their country; they set the standards. They threaten us all the time not to renew our contracts unless we do as they say, and happy students mean they will stay at our school and therefore mommy and daddy's money will stay here as well. Follow the money. That's where "education" is these days.

The one that needed to be said

2011-06-20T11:56:00.001+09:00

Nobody in my family will come and get me at the Detroit airport when I fly in from Korea. So, I had to make a car rental reservation to drive to my hometown of West Branch. The closest place to my hometown where I can return the car is a small airport 50 miles away. Even at that short distance, a mere 50 miles, an hour's trip (after my 6,700 miles and 13 hours to get there from Korea), nobody wants to go that far on "the fourth of July weekend" to drive me back after returning the car. They're afraid of the horrible traffic, even though the weekend doesn't start until Friday evening and the car return is Friday morning. Here is what I wrote to my family, then deleted and didn't send. However, I needed to get this off my chest:

The entire state of Michigan has a population that is one third the population of Seoul, South Korea, a single city. You do not have traffic, trust me. If everyone in Michigan decided to go to one place all at the same time, you still wouldn't have traffic.

I'm sick of it. I'm sick of my own family believing that me traveling literally halfway across the planet to see them is easy, cheap and stress-free. It isn't. There is not a one of you I wouldn't go meet at any airport, literally any, or risk life and limb to pick up even if you had only gone a few miles to get there. I could never allow anyone I love to be stranded anywhere for any length of time if I had the means to prevent it.

I know my value to my family, I have known it for years, but I persist in visiting you all anyway because you are dear to my heart even though I am of little account to you. When you're gone, any of you, I will be beside myself with grief. On the other hand, if I were to die tomorrow I can guarantee that not a single one of you would bother to come and collect the things that were special to my life or see where I lived or show any interest in my accomplishments. So enjoy this visit; it is the last I will make. There are places I would like to see, but I haven't, because I thought visiting you was more important. No more. I will see the places I want from now on, and if you want to see me, you'll do the traveling, you'll spend the money, you'll take on the stress.

Love,

Mike

The one about nothing

2011-05-17T09:54:00.001+09:00

“For if those who are nothing think they are something, they deceive themselves.”

Letter to the Galatians 6.3

To accept that we are nothing is one of the hardest things to do. The more we understand about the universe and how it works, the more we realize that we aren't all that special as a life form. The rise of life on this planet has been remarkable. It's survival has been phenomenal. Life began from a single source, a simple cell that somehow multiplied and expanded into all the marvelous variation we witness today. However, for generations, for millennia actually, Mankind has believed that he is not just distinct from all other life, he is specially made. He has a soul that, unlike any other life forms, will survive beyond the death of the physical body.

Something about us wants to live on after the death of the body. We don't want to think about an eternity of nothingness, non-existence, and oblivion. Oblivion, a state of non-existence, a real oxymoron since “state” implies existence! See how hard it is to talk about this? Our very language constrains us because we have rarely confronted the true nature of human life. Like all other life that developed from the same humble beginnings as we did, at the end of our lives, we cease to exist. We do not have souls that go to heaven or hell to be rewarded for our good and punished for our bad. We do not become ghosts to wander the earth waiting for the resurrection of the dead on judgement day. To believe that Mankind is a special life would require a dividing line between our current form and our ancestral species. At what point did our evolving species gain these souls? There would have to be a generation of humans/protohumans where the children were granted souls and the parents were not. That's a very unpleasant thought. The first evolved humans with souls would not be able to live in eternity with their parents or grandparents. It is that logical reality that demonstrates the idiotic mentality of those who believe Man is a special creation. We are obviously evolved. It's a proven fact. But who is willing to draw the line in our evolution where this generation has souls and the previous one does not? The only logical conclusions are all life has a collective soul, each life form has a soul, or no life form has a soul. There is no evidence of the first two, so only the third option remains.

We are nothing more than a variation within the world of living creatures. We are not special except among ourselves. When the sun expands and engulfs this planet down the road a couple billion years from now, everything we were, had, built, or spoken will be disintegrated. Not even the dust particles of our long dead bodies will remain intact. Perhaps the descendants of our species will survive and learn to live among the stars. Perhaps another species will evolve and do so in our stead. A billion years is a long, long time.

Not wanting to die and disappear from existence is one thing. It's an understandable longing. Creating a fantasy where that really doesn't happen despite all evidence and observation is quite another. Facing reality is better. It's honest, and honesty is really the best policy, as the old saying goes. Knowing that this life is your only life compels you to live better. It urges you to live it to the best of your ability. It makes you stop to enjoy it more often. It chastises you for taking life for granted in yourself and others. It tells us that even if we are nothing in the long run, we are something in the here and now.

The one on the waterside

2011-05-09T12:22:00.001+09:00

This weekend I had hoped to enjoy a motorbike trip up the eastern coast of Korea, and yesterday, I did do that, but I ended up coming home at the end of the day instead of staying at a min-bak (B&B/inn) or camping. I didn't like being alone. It kind of brought me down a little to be seeing all this beauty and experiencing the trip without having anyone to share it and talk about it. It was a gorgeous day, though, and I saw some interesting things, like this old lighthouse.

Some folks gathering and sorting seaweed to prepare it for drying.

People fishing off these old rocks at the base of the lighthouse cliff.

A lone fisherman.

A crew headed out to sea...

... from their peaceful little town.

Even though I felt as lonely as that man on the rock seems, the ride and the scenery made up for it. The Korean coast is a good excursion on a motorbike. It has several beaches, parks, seaside villages, inns, and little ma & pa diners, but also long stretches of open road to enjoy the view of the sea and the hills and the peaceful waterside life here. On the one side is the smell of the sea, a smell that reminds me of some of the happiest days of my life. It's the smell of untold ages of life on earth, the smell of danger, bravery, and power. On the other side is the smell of farms and barns and chicken coops, the scents of my earliest memories. I breathed deeply, and the simultaneous aroma of the sea and the farm aroused primal longing that ran through my soul so freely I couldn't stop it. I reveled in it. I stood naked and still within it even as the wind embraced man and machine.

I've never been comfortable with being alone, though it seems to be my destiny. However, even alone, the Korean coast is an adventure. Take it, if the opportunity arises. It is not the usual Korea.

The one about a parasite

2011-04-06T12:31:00.000+09:00

America is torn sharply between the Republican view and the Democratic view. Both sides believe that the other is destructive. However, let's look at what is actually destructive about them.

Democratic governance, if we ever see it again, tries to limit the impact of excessive greed on the average citizen. It demands a lighter burden on the poor and lower middle class, a higher burden for the upper classes because they can shoulder the burden without diminishing their standard of living in the least. It demands that large corporations who benefit from the protection of the United States pay for that protection by paying taxes on their activities. Democratic governance tries to make sure that primary and secondary education are available to all in order to ensure the competitive edge America has traditionally enjoyed in the world. It refuses to consider the weak, handicapped, and elderly as useless appendages not worth the time and expense. It does not turn its back on children who happen to be born in poor families as unworthy of medical care simply because their parents are too poor to pay for it. Democratic governance uses the public money to invest in the growth, prosperity, and success of the nation collectively.

Republican governance tries to ensure a shield of separation for the wealthy that excuses them from paying taxes according to their ability. It makes sure that corporations pay little if nothing in taxes to the country that makes their activities possible. Republican governance tries to dismantle public education by undercutting the rights of teachers, introducing sectarian religion into the curriculum, planning to take apart the Department of Education, cutting education budgets, and propagating the lie that educated people are unproductive elitists. Republican governance sees no relationship between the prosperity and success of the United States and the skill of its population. It cuts money to train the handicapped. It takes away funding for the elderly and children. It fights to stop children from poor families receiving medical care. Republican governance uses the public money to prop up a tiny select class of wealthy patrons whose growth, prosperity, and success garner the nation nothing but more poverty, fewer job opportunities, and wider gaps between the social classes. The inevitable outcome of this short-sighted avarice is class warfare.

To look at the two sides honestly, it is obvious that one of them is destructive of society while one is not. One is a parasitical pest that uses the American public to gain obscene profits on the backs of the lower classes without any sense of obligation to help the nation that supports them. One needs to be swatted like mosquitoes, and I, for one, am willing to gladly join in the swatting.

The one about stupid people

2011-04-05T09:50:00.000+09:00

I shouldn't, for my blood pressure's sake, but I do anyway. I read and listen to stories about how the christ cultists around America are doing everything in their power to corrupt the educational system of our country. Lately it's a bill in the Tennessee legislature that is about as blatant an attempt to make religious mythology a valid alternative to the life sciences as anything we've seen in the last 80 years.

I listened to a scientist from Vanderbilt University give a statement before the Tennessee lawmakers, a good statement, a solid statement, making the clearly reasonable point that the bill is religious in nature because there is no scientific controversy about evolution. It is purely a religious controversy, hence any discussion of evolution as controversial is religious in nature and thereby beyond the purview of the government. The logic is unassailable, and yet the religious lawmakers stumbled over themselves to declare the scientist's words mere "opinion" on a par with anyone else's opinion. Let's call that what it is, stupid and arrogant.

It's frustrating to listen to stupid people. It really is. People who believe that religious dogma and doctrine are true are stupid people. Can you think of a different word for those who take unfounded assertions and believe them as fact? They don't "hope" there's a god. They assert it as true in the face of no evidence. They don't "wonder" if there was a universal flood 5 thousand years ago; they proclaim it as fact when there is no proof. Stupid is the only fitting term for this behavior. It is like knowing through observation and logic that the square of 9 is 81 and yet having to deal with somebody in authority who says it is not 81, it is something else, and that this opinion must be allowed in math class. That is not doing the young people of the state or the country a service. It is not doing anyone a service except the business of church.

Evolution is a fact. Natural selection is the only theory that anyone has put forward that has survived the countless tests and charges against it. Religious mythology may, I mean a big MAY, have meaning to some people on an artistic level, but it is not fact. Genesis is not true. It paints pictures that may inspire something in the minds of its readers, but it is not history. It is not science. It is not truth in any reasonable meaning of the word.

As the American public grows stupider and stupider (by choice), and as they continue to elect their stupid comrades to high office, it will not end well. America will lose its scientific edge. It will lose its leadership base to nations that do not put stupid people in charge. America will lose. Period.

The one about mistakes

2011-04-01T12:47:00.001+09:00

Here is today's email from the department I work in:

Dear teachers,

At first, I want to apologize to you about contract that you signed. I made a mistake again. Before as I know we have to get a signature from president, but it has been changed from this year. We need to get a signature from the chairman of the board. And Chairman said he want to get a contract in Korean, too.

So I want you to sign 4 contract. 2 - English version, 2 - Korean version After I get a signature from the chairman, I will give you yours. Second, you signed the contract before, we will destroy. But if you want to destroy, you could bring. We have your contract that you already signed before. Again, I am really sorry for this inconvenience. I will try to be more professional. I hope see you soon in the Lounge. Have a lovely weekend.

Sincerely,

[name withheld]

Our contract period begins on March 1st every year... every single year, the same date (our lowly status as faux-assistant profs makes us ineligible for multiple-year contracts). We are notified in mid-December if we are not going to be offered a new contract for the coming year. Those who are going to be offered a contract are not told anything one way or the other. I suppose it works, but what if they make a mistake... "again" ?

Since we are just now getting our contracts, what was that "contract" I took to the immigration office to get my visa a month or so ago? Hurried explanation from the office: that was just a generic contract to show the government. Great. Being a foreigner in a strange land and deceiving the government doesn't instill much confidence in me, but what if that's why they do it? Keep the foreigners off their balance. Make sure they're in a constant state of borderline confusion. And who signs what? Shouldn't that be known by the people who are drawing these papers up? Which contract is the legal one, the English or the Korean? My first contract here a few years ago, I discovered a discrepancy between the English and the Korean versions (which they fixed in favor of the English version).

When you come to Korea, there is a period, a grace period, I suppose, where the newbie expat is learning so much that he/she lets a lot of stuff slide to focus on basic survival skills. After the expat gets her/his feet solidly on the ground and is used to the landscape, then the bizarro world of Korea becomes the elephant in the room we kind of felt before but never looked at too closely. We complain about the nutty and incongruous behavior here, but then we learn that nobody likes to hear us complain, not even other complaining expats! And complaining does absolutely no good.

So we live with it. We live with the haphazard, slapdash way they do everything, from legal contracts and immigration law to painting the rusted out aluminum siding on the general store. We live (and sometimes die) with the reckless and irresponsible mania that passes for driving here. We tolerate the constant noise. We learn to ignore the thousands of children over the years who point at us on the sidewalk and scream "America person!" in Korean and run to their mothers' sides.

I'm not ranting about this email specifically. This email is simply another manifestation in a long string demonstrating what a fish out of water most of us expats are in this land. We were raised to try, try as best we can, to get and keep our ducks in a line, plan ahead so as not to make someone else's life a living hell for no reason, to drive politely and safely, to lower our voices in public places, to not stare at people who look different and certainly not yell out and point. (It's not polite to point, remember?)

Fourteen years of this, and what have I learned? I guess it's patience. Without patience, someone would have died by now.

The one with a cat's eye

2011-03-06T12:06:00.000+09:00

Several years ago, before my believer friends stopped trying to reconvert me, I was in a conversation about religion and atheism. Of course, there are hardly any believers who really know what atheism is beyond the rhetoric spewed out of their not-so-friendly neighborhood pulpits. Consequently, when you have a conversation about this subject with a religious person, you have to set the vocabulary parameters before you can proceed. Atheism is simply the following: “There is no demonstrable evidence that any gods exist.” That's all. If you were to produce evidence, the atheist would change his mind. It's that simple. The believers deride that by saying 'the evidence is all around us.' You can even find a passage from the letters of Paul in the New Testament that agrees with that statement, so it's not a new idea. However, it is a reckless idea all the same.

When I look around me, I see a marvelous world full of life, a huge magnificent universe full of physics to boggle the mind, but I do not see anything that demonstrates whether a god, or gods, did any of it. A believer will ask, “How else could it be?” a question that a wise person cannot answer. The believer will foolishly take the atheist's inability to answer the question as tacit consent that a god produced everything we see around us. A wise person cannot jump to that conclusion, however. It doesn't follow that because nobody knows exactly how something happened that your guess is necessarily correct. Your guess might be wrong. An atheist is quite willing to say that a god or gods might very well exist; we just don't have any evidence of that. Conversely, a believer is quite unwilling to say that a god might not exist. It is here that any conversation with a believer will begin to fall apart. The atheist is expected to be yielding and open, but the believer is not. Maybe with that in mind you can understand the frustration that atheists express when trying to talk to believers about this subject. The believers say these “new” atheists are angry, when in fact it is the double standard believers apply to the two sides that create significant aggravation on the part of atheists.

For me, a universe without any gods is neither good nor bad. If there are gods or a god or a great intelligent force, so be it. Apparently whatever is out there, if it is out there, is unconcerned with us, so neither belief nor disbelief merits you anything. I live my life in the reality of the observable universe, not what I wish or hope there to be to satisfy my need for some “deeper meaning” to it all. So what if there's no meaning to life beyond living it? How could that knowledge possibly harm you? So there is no over-arching Lord of the Heavens to praise and worship. So what? What could be more awe inspiring than to know for a fact that every living thing on earth descended from one solitary cell billions of years ago? I can look at the lemon tree growing in my living room, my cat, hear a bird out the window, and taste the mold growing on my cheddar cheese and know for a demonstrable fact that all these manifestations of life are related to me, intimately. We all have a common ancestor, a fact proven over and again by genetic science and simple biological principles. Did a god start that first cell? I don't know, but why out of all the wonderfully natural elements that have arisen in this vast universe would this solitary item need the touch of divinity upon it when nothing else does?

Belief in gods, or even a single god, doesn't make you a better person in and of itself. The group you share belief with is what makes you who you are as a believer, not the belief itself. Lack of belief doesn't make you innately good or bad either. Neither you nor I know exactly how the universe started, and if there was a reason, we haven't the slightest clue what that reason might be. Therefore, it is only wise to default to atheism since there is no demonstrable reason to believe any gods exist. With atheism as the default position, there is no need to try to force others to adopt religious doctrines and dogmas as public policy since such doctrines and dogmas are tacitly meaningless. There is no reason for religious groups to expect and receive favors from the government since the government is designed to serve all citizens equally, believers and unbelievers alike. There is no reason to pin our national or planetary hopes for the future on ancient religious literature since the bible is ludicrously in error on more topics than I have time to list, and the quran is nothing more than the incoherent ramblings of a self-proclaimed prophet. I live quite contentedly in the default position, because it is the only one that makes sense. What is, is. What is not, is not. There is nothing beyond these two propositions as far as we know. Live with it.

Photo: Nasa Hubble, Cat's Eye Nebula, as it was about 3000 years ago.

The one about abortion

2011-02-24T10:06:00.000+09:00

In Western culture, abortion was generally permitted within the first 40-90 days of pregnancy until the christian cult came to dominate and abortion was pretty much outlawed based on the christian belief that inception is when a human soul is bestowed upon the fetus. Hence, any deliberate termination of the fetus is technically murder according to this doctrine. Of course, there were times and places of leniency with this rule, but it has remained doctrine since the earliest days of the christ cult whether or not is has always been enforced to the letter.

The doctrine does not hinge specifically on the bible, though throughout the centuries, christians have used biblical passages and stories as backdrop to the doctrine. Notably these are the pregnancy of John the Baptist's mother, Elizabeth, the pregnancy of Mary, the mother of Jesus, and certain poetic passages from the Hebrew scriptures which mention gestation in the womb.

The fact that the bible is completely silent on the matter of abortion is of little account when it comes to the position of the Roman church on this subject. The church has always maintained the position that God reveals truths in many ways, not just in the scriptures, so it isn't surprising that God has revealed that abortion is always wrong but never said so in the bible. But what about the protestant heterodoxy? That whole movement came into being under the banner that the bible was the sole source of faith and practice, yet they, too, claim abortion is wrong even though the scriptures neither confirm nor deny it. Therein lies something difficult for the protestants to answer. The best you're going to get from them is a long and winding trip through philosophical Disneyland where there are several allusions to the bible, but nothing concrete from its pages. However, even if the bible had mentioned abortion, it would only be valid if the bible were a legitimate source of information about the world and the nature of life.

The christians' first unsubstantiated statement is the linchpin to their whole belief system about abortion: humans have souls. But there is no proof of that; it's just a belief. It's in the bible, but as I say, there is nothing that validates the bible as a legitimate source of knowledge or counsel. The authority of the bible is itself simply a chosen belief. But don't get me wrong. I do not care in the least whether you accept the bible or not. Believe the bible to your heart's content! Enjoy the poetry and revel in the exciting stories! Find your inspiration for life in its pages! It doesn't bother me one bit. You are as free to believe as I am free not to.

The current mania of the christians to strong-arm their abortion philosophy on all of us is based on three beliefs that have absolutely no foundation. The first is, of course, people have souls. The second is that God invests a soul on the zygote at inception, and the third is that the bible is true or at least mostly true. Not a single one of these ideas can be corroborated by facts or observations. If you want to force your religion, or even part of your religion, on others who don't believe in it, you'd better have a little more going for you than wild-eyed claims about ethereal elements and literary fiction. People have been killed at the hands of christians because of these unvalidated propositions. Now they are on the brink of wresting power unto themselves to enforce their cockeyed fantasies as law.

Abortion is obviously an issue, and it's a serious matter, but it is not a black and white debate where opinions fall neatly on one of two sides. When the church, both the evangelicals and the traditional church, create the false impression that there are only two sides of the abortion debate, they are simply doing that to lend the appearance of credibility to their unfounded assumptions. Creating a false dilemma is an old trick, but it only works on people who have abandoned logical and reasoned thinking. There are many facets to the question of abortion, not just two. Anyone who tells you otherwise is lying, which is a sin, but apparently not a bad enough sin to avoid.

Nobody is saying the christians have no right to their opinion on abortion. What I'm saying is that christians have no right to claim that all other opinions must be exterminated because they don't accept the idea that humans have souls and the bible is true. If you believe that humans have souls, that God imparts souls at inception, and that the bible is true, so be it. I can't make you see reason. But as soon as you cross over the line and attempt to compel others by force to adopt your unjustified philosophy, then don't be surprised at the opposition you encounter. Free people do not willingly surrender their freedom to tyrants. And don't be surprised if some of the opposition comes from those who actually believe the same as you do about abortion, but will not support your attempts to subvert American liberty under the influence of religious fervor. If freedom isn't for all, then it's for none.

The one with conflict

2011-02-20T09:26:00.000+09:00

During a recent segment of Glenn Beck's Bozo the Clown hour, he called in an "antichrist expert" to talk about where the current political situation in the world fits in to God's final countdown to the end of the world. Beck and his "expert" often referred to the return of christ, and that just makes me plain old disappointed in Man's progress, and a little annoyed, if truth be told. Anyone who has seriously looked into the subject of Jesus of Nazareth reaches no honest conclusion other than the Jesus of the New Testament is a mythic figure; there isn't the slightest shred of history behind the Jesus mythology. Jesus as a flesh-and-blood figure was created to make christian principles more accessible to the uninformed masses and to place the salvific christ sacrifice into a setting that people could relate to. The Gospels are not a record of historical facts or even doctored facts or even badly retold facts. They are entirely made up in order to present christian principles in narrative format.

When you're a believer, as I was for many years, you train yourself to ignore the problems in the bible that indicate Jesus was not real. You gloss over biblical difficulties and in the back of your mind you trust those wise old preachers you adore to understand it all and comfort you that there really is no problem, these are not the droids you're looking for. But honesty compels us to look at the bible squarely, expose it to the light, scrutinize its claims, in effect, treating it as if it were the word of God. If it is God's word, then it will be perfect in all respects, as God is perfect. Oh, but wait! Now, the christians claim that because the bible was given to Man, and Man is imperfect, we have somehow corrupted the bible, the perfect word of God. The perfect word of a God is able to be corrupted by Man? That calls into question its original perfection, wouldn't you say? Oh, but then wait again! It is SO perfect that we just can't grasp it well enough to resolve the conflicts found within it. Then why did the God give it to us in the first place if He knew we couldn't understand it very well? Oh, but wait! And on and on in that vein... That's how the christians will lead you down the convoluted path of their circular logic until you get so mired in their preposterous nonsense that you either surrender (a word they LOVE to use!) or just give up on the whole subject.

When the modern radical right, which includes the evangelical cults all across the country, start bringing in their mythology as though it were real history (or real future), it's a harbinger of serious conflicts to come. The christians have talked about the "coming conflict" for as long as I can remember, and I'm not a young man. They feed on conflict. They become giddy in the anticipation of conflict. War, battle, and bloodshed are very common themes among the evangelical cults, and when you have millions of people who have grown up inured to those three horrors, who knows what they're capable of? They anticipate a "second coming" of a Jesus who never came a first time. They have been hoping for this since the third century, and they have remained disappointed all that time. Now they have slowly but surely grasped great political power in the most heavily armed nation on earth, the nation that holds the most wealth of the world, a nation whose general citizenry has a long tradition of political apathy. Will they try to make their prophecies come true? Was that what caused George the Second to invade Iraq, to invoke his cult's mythic views? I wouldn't be surprised, though we'll probably never know. Christians in politics is not in itself a bad thing, in fact, it's a good thing for as many citizens as possible to be active in politics. However, they are not active in politics for the good of the nation, but to install their mythology and doctrine as the law of the land. That is not a good thing. Politics has to come to conclusions that benefit the most people possible, not just one strict ideology. Politics has to deal with the real world as it is, not as some see it through bible-colored lenses.

The one about civic duty

2011-02-11T12:13:00.000+09:00

They're cleaning the building today. As I sit here in my office and listen to the cleaning crew, it reminds me of seminary. In our seminary, and I don't think this is common for seminaries, the student body was required to pitch in on a weekly basis to clean the common-use buildings, take care of the grounds, and any other chores that needed doing. We also had to take turns washing dishes in the refectory. It's based on an old christian principle called ora et labora, prayer and work. It probably comes from years of communal sharing among earlier christian groups, reflected in St. Paul's admonition, "if he will not work, neither let him eat." There were some of the seminary who claimed that the principle was really ora est labore, prayer is work, but there is no historical evidence that any early christians thought about it that way, though at the time, many of us thought that this was not a bad way of looking at it.

However, there is something cathartic about mundane labor done for the community in which one lives. When you share something, you take care of it for one reason or the other. Maybe you don't want others to think badly of you for mistreating communal spaces, or maybe you take pride in your work caring for it, or maybe you like the others you share it with and want them to be as pleased as you are about it. Whatever the reason, communal living offers many opportunities to serve and be served.

I've read that the ancient Greeks required citizens to participate in cult performances as a civic duty. Of course, people are always people, and as the old religion was replaced with the new christian cult, the need for civic duty waned, the work done by the lower classes who couldn't afford to shirk the responsibilities, a situation that has remained unchanged to this day. Though America is a diverse nation, technically neutral on religion, there are still many things that could be done by citizens pitching in. Wouldn't that be an old fashioned idea come round if perhaps citizens could get their taxes cut in exchange for raking the public parks and sweeping the courthouse walkways? Scooping trash from the creek and mowing the lawns of the town cemetery? Civic duty is a phrase fallen by the wayside, or rather, pushed aside by that modern idea of Individualism, what we might be tempted to call "Me-Firstism" as we survey the panorama of it's insidious effects upon our country. It's not a Democratic or Republican idea, definitely not a "Libertarian" or "Tea Party" idea, this notion of community and civic duty, social responsibility. It's a human idea. I am who I am because of the community that bore and nurtured me.

So we probably aren't going to go back to the townsfolk pitching in to paint the school, but we can at least cultivate a mindset of civic responsibility. We can look at our town, our county, our state, and even our nation as our brothers and sisters. We can be more patient at the DMV. We can be respectful at school board and town hall meetings. We can always be more generous and forgiving of the people we share our community with. It's an old idea that might just get a second life even in these modern, fast-paced times.

The One About Faith

2011-01-22T22:52:00.000+09:00

"Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen."

These words are found in the treatise to the Hebrews in the New Testament, and just to piss off the evangelicals and fundamentalists, I will not give the chapter and verse. My opinion of chapter and verse references is that if you are so ignorant of the bible that you cannot recognize it when you hear it, then you are a piss poor student of the damn thing and not worth my time in the first place. That out of the way, let's return our attention to the words above.

Any commentary you read will have all kinds of qualifying and backtracking remarks about this text, because on the surface, it seems to say that faith is substantial and is evidence. Yet, most of us who haven't completely closed our minds to the realities of the universe can see quite clearly that faith is the antithesis of substance and evidence, especially the evidence bit. Believers in the heavenly bogey man have been and still are quite proud of the fact that they have faith in the presence of no evidence. They believe without a single substantial element of reason, and they find it both pious and noble to do so. But the human mind, in my opinion, cannot live with that irrational insanity without stress somewhere along the seams.

The human mind needs to make connections that give structure and order to the world around us. We need to see that the chair has four legs before we sit on it. We need evidence before we act. When someone calls out at home, "It's snowing!" what's the first thing we do? We look out the window for ourselves to verify the report, not with cynicism, but just because it's our natural reaction. That marvelous characteristic is what protects us and keeps us alive and well.

So why is it in every other aspect of human life, people need evidence before they act, yet when it comes to some of the craziest non sequiturs in human history, some people are willing to believe them fully, devotedly, and militantly? For example, they say "something" must have made the universe. Granted, "something" might have, but how to you get from "something" to the Apostle's Creed without a lot of making stuff up along the way? Why do you believe what was written in a book a long time ago by people you didn't know? How do you know they weren't lying? How do you know they didn't misunderstand events? You don't know. You simply chose to believe what someone told you, and you discovered that absolving yourself of all responsibility to think and reason for yourself makes you feel kind of good, a little euphoric, so you call that euphoria the "holy spirit" and there you have it! A ready-made "inner witness", something the rest of us call circular logic.

The fact is, faith has no substance. It is certainly not evidence of anything except maybe gullibility. We all know that if there were actually evidence of anything the religious authorities try to push on us then the need for faith would disappear. In the face of evidence, faith no longer exists. To me, that means faith has no place in the human mind. To believe something stupid simply because I am told to believe is itself blatant stupidity. If we apply to religious nuttery the same tests of substance and evidence we apply to all else, then we should easily and quickly see that religion is nothing but an illusion, or a delusion.

Photo: by Rembrandt, who is dead, so I'm using his painting of the Apostle for decoration.

The one about Christ

2011-01-07T20:02:00.000+09:00

When I was a christian, the ultimate guiding principle of my life was the life of Christ as revealed in the New Testament. I was one of those guys who always had a pocket New Testament, not for show, but because I really believed in it. I always read it when circumstances gave me spare time. I was ridiculed by some in school because of my habit of pulling out my New Testament as soon as my ass hit a chair. At one point in my life, I would have taken a bet that I could have quoted in order most of the New Testament. In my mind, the New Testament was explicitly how God wanted his disciples to live. The New Testament was expressly the word of God, and Jesus was the very presence of God in the flesh, and that made Christ the only model of life for believers. Everything Christ taught both explicitly and implicitly became the only goal of my life. It was the only possible way to live. As far as I was concerned, God did not sanction any other way of looking at things. The way of Christ was the only way God approved of. I couldn't understand anyone who thought otherwise. The whole world around me was seen through the eyes of Christ. It was, therefore, impossible for me to ignore the poor, to disregard the helpless, to stand off from the needy.

When I realized, eventually, that right-wing partisans also claimed Christ, I was flabbergasted. To me, it was impossible to be a follower of Christ and not believe in workers' rights, care for the poor and needy, equality of the races, respect for women, and social reform for the good of the community. To realize that some whom I called brethren in the faith were working hard against the Christ of the New Testament purely to satisfy their own political or socio-economic agenda was disheartening to say the least. However, it helped the light to dawn on me that very few people who claimed Christ actually revered and followed his path. Even though time and experience taught me that religion is nonsense and christianism is a lie, that earlier devotion to the life of Christ somehow lingered within me. I no longer believe Jesus was anything more than a carefully constructed myth, but what the myth stood for in real, personal terms has stuck with me. I can talk about Christ and look up to him as though he had been real and continue to model my life on his example by not shunning the downtrodden, not turning my back on the needy, not refusing to help the poor, and not giving in to the liars who claim Christ yet do everything in their power to emasculate what he stands for. Why? It doesn't matter whether a real god-man savior existed or not. What matters is we exist now and can save the world if we choose to. It doesn't matter if there is a heaven or not; what matters is doing the right thing now. If you claim Christ, and you reject what he stands for, how do you explain yourself? How do you get off exalting your culture, your business, your banks above your Christ? You probably believe he existed and believe that he will be your judge at the end of time. You, then, of all people should be wary of acting against him. I wonder at your kind.

The one about prophecy.

2010-12-29T09:24:00.000+09:00

One thing I am very grateful for living outside the asylum of America is that I don't have ready access to the Fox network. What I see of Fox Noise is my own choice online, not what happens to pop up in my living room uninvited on the TV. Recently, they have been harping that christian privilege is disappearing. They don't like it, and even liberal christians whinge and moan about people not giving religious faith its "due respect". Even here, without television, I am aware beyond my need to know of the so-called war Fox is waging to force the rest of us to acknowledge the insanity of religion as an integral element of our society. Religious belief is widespread, yes, and it is popular, too, but constitutive? No, it is not. One of the creators on YouTube I subscribe to made a video recently about this subject, and at one point in his exasperation over christians crying for more favoritism from the State says,

"Like you need the government to give a thumbs up to your faith!"

That pretty much sums up what today's evangelicals and fundamentalists are up to. They want the stamp and seal of approval from the State. It's in perfect line with their triumphalist philosophy, but it's not in line with the needs of American society. Christians are not the only religious group in the country. However, christians demand the State acknowledge just one religion, and let's face it, only the conservative part of that one religion. According to their religious faith, conservative christians are the only people chosen by god for salvation, and that, dare I say it? Yes, that is the permission slip that allows them arrogance beyond the pale. When a group of people believe with every molecule of their being that they are chosen by god, they are the only true children of god, that they alone are going to rule the new heaven and the new earth after their savior returns, and that their prophecies of the future are the only true prophecies, yes, that makes for hubris unmeasured and a danger to the rest of us lowly scum.

What about those prophecies? When prophesies are not being fulfilled at the rate expected, why not help them along a little? Why not sow discord in the Middle East where your prophesies say discord will result in the final showdown of god and satan and the triumph of your faith over unbelievers? Why not reject arms treaties with Russia when your prophesies say Russia must be one of satan's pawns at the end times? Prophecies have to come true or those who spouted them and those who believed them are wrong at best, malicious at worst. The early christians said Jesus promised to return before the first generation of christians all died, and he did not. From the very beginning, the christian religion has been proven a false religion by its own standards (Deuteronomy 18.22).

How many other prophecies are wrong? Of course, I believe they are all wrong. You cannot predict the future; you can only create it, a heart-stopping thought when religious nuts are in charge of armies and bombs. But for the sake of argument, what if just one of the major christian prophecies is wrong and they are in charge of the State trying to force the prophecy to come true? Think of the disaster that will follow in the wake. The reason our founding fathers drew that heavy line between religion and government is to preserve the integrity of both. If the State interferes with religion, you get the Spanish Inquisition. If religion interferes with the State, you get the English Civil Wars. Someday, I hope all people will recognize that religion has nothing to offer the world. It's a relic of human existence that had its time and place but now is less than unnecessary. Until then, it is best to keep religion and government within their particular and separate realms for the safety of us all.

YouTube: http://www.youtube.com/freethinker3161

A Letter to Korea

2010-12-28T17:32:00.001+09:00

Years ago, after helping to liberate Korea from the cruelty of Japanese oppression, our nation's fathers, brothers, uncles, and nephews came to your country once again in response to your great need. I met some of those who survived and returned to tell the story of the Korean War. The North Koreans, egged on and fueled by the megalomaniac Josef Stalin, invaded the South in a sweeping, all-encompassing attempt to subjugate it to the whims of one-party dictatorship based on a twisted interpretation of socialism that bore no resemblance to the ideals preached by the propagandists of Sovietism.

33,700 Americans died on the battlefields of Korea. 2,700 died while POWs. The fruits of the ground have borne the vital energy of Americans who died to keep Korea free and sovereign. The strength of Korean bodies and souls have come from the sacrifices of my countrymen as well as their own and those of other nations who stood by our side. And it wasn't all that long ago, though young people will not think so. Youth has no sense of time, really. There are still about 4 million veterans of the Korean War still living. Korea rebuilt after the war with generous grants and loans with no or minimal interest. By the mid-1980's, Korea was a prosperous partner with the United States enjoying the benefits of equitable trade. You still find older Koreans who know what America did for their country in their darkest days of need. Yes, there was politics involved; you can't ignore it. But at the heart was America's desire for a strong and independent Korea. A stable partner is more advantageous to all.

Times change, however. Empires and superpowers crack and weaken. Many of us from America have come to our nation's friend asking for help in these tough times. When jobs were scarce at home, Korea offered us what they had, and we have been grateful for the income and benefits. In America, only the rich or well-employed can see a doctor, but Korea has been kind to us economic refugees. We have no fear here that a doctor's visit will deplete our savings. Medical care is considered a social necessity and is affordable, the burden borne by all for all, a nation united for the common good.

There has not been a street or alley I have feared to traverse by day or night. The Korean people, though sometimes hard to fathom, are kinder to us than most of us deserve, at least more than I deserve. They usually forgive us our social clumsiness and our outbursts of frustration with an understanding of human nature that reaches beyond culture and language. I am certain that even without the debt of our ancestral sacrifice for their country, the Korean people would still kindly offer us jobs and benefits as much as they could reasonably bear.

This is my letter to the Korean people saying "Thank you" for helping us who have washed up on your shores. Thank you for taking us in while our homeland suffered economic chaos at the hands of unscrupulous politicians, corporate greed, and Wall Street incompetence. Maybe a minority, but I, for one, am grateful.

The one about the Golden Rule

2010-12-18T20:25:00.000+09:00

“In everything do to others as you would have them do to you.”

Anyone who is even moderately educated knows that this “Golden Rule” is very, very old. It goes back so far, nobody knows who said it first. The christ cults of earlier centuries put it into the mouth of the Jesus character of the gospels, but it predates the christ mythology by several millennia. This does not mean, however, that the saying is of no value. Its sheer age from time unknown attests to its worth. Almost all religions have had or have some version of it. There is something about it that inspires human beings to a nobler life that takes into consideration the effects of their behavior on others.

What troubles me most about my own life is that I am inconsistent in practicing this virtue, and this fact is pointed out to me fairly regularly, for which I am both embarrassed and grateful. But why has Mankind created and passed on this saying for so many, many centuries if it is so easily flouted? The answer speaks volumes to the basic goodness of human nature: We recognize it as the highest possible good. Christianism is wrong when it starts from the premise that human beings are evil by nature. Anyone's experience will show that people actually lean toward kindness and compassion, all things being equal. Of course, not all things are equal. The rich are rarely arrested as thieves. Those from peaceful upbringings hardly ever go on killing sprees. The attractive seldom want for romantic satisfaction.

Life is not guided by a benevolent creator, that seems clear. If there is a creator, I'd say the extent of its concern rests solely in allowing life to exist at all. It certainly seems unconcerned with the quality of that life. However, human beings are concerned with the quality of life. We can improve life or diminish it by sheer will. And we recognize that we can improve our quality of life more when we work in consideration of others. We know that we reap what we sow. Bad behavior often brings bad behavior back on us. Good behavior usually produces good behavior toward us. And yet, it's hard to say that our human compassion is merely for the selfish desire to get back what we give. Look at your life. Aren't you kind when there is sometimes little expectation of kindness in return? Don't you sacrifice a little more than you can spare of time, money, resources? It isn't a social experiment; it's a time-tested truism about human life.

At this time of year, it's not uncommon to reflect on the Golden Rule. Christmas may be a religious observance in the strictest sense, but it's culturally ingrained as well, even among many non-christians. Gift giving, though often over-emphasized, is still the expression of benevolence toward others. Graciously receiving gifts, the same. Don't we seem more social this time of year? Church gatherings, of course, but there are also office parties and pageants and plays and family reunions as well as the exhilaration of shopping amid the vibrant crowds. The Golden Rule is not really a rule to follow as much as it is a reminder of what we human beings really are as we struggle to make all things be equal.

The one about Christmas Smoke

2010-12-15T09:22:00.000+09:00

Some of you may know that I am enamored of the philosophy of Tao. Not that it answers all the questions, of course, but because it's an icon of human perception of the universe. Positive and Negative. It allows for a balanced view of things. Sitting here using the computer, I am aware that this machine performs its functions solely using combinations of positive and negative units. It is the principle of Tao unfolding before my eyes with every stroke of the keys.

When I was a christian, I lived with an example of this positive and negative play of forces. They told me the Old Testament and the New Testament were both, together, the perfect word of our god. Yet, the messages contained, both explicit and implicit, were opposites in many ways. They also told me that Jesus was god in the flesh and his teachings were primary. The Book of the Gospels was paraded to great fanfare and ceremony during worship in order to underscore the preeminence of the words of Jesus over any other teaching. Only an ordained minister could read aloud from the Gospels during worship, they were that highly regarded... in form.

But even a cursory look at the "perfect word of god" shows Jesus and the Old Testament are often at odds. This allows for some fancy footwork on the part of those wily christians, though. If Jesus is too tough, well, you can still obey god by appealing to the Old Testament for an easier path to walk. If the Old Testament is too gory for your tastes, then you can claim Jesus, or better yet, you can do what christians have done for centuries, just mix the Old Testament and Jesus together in unequal portions, and you can create a watered-down version of both that on the surface looks perfectly biblical! Turn the other cheek when it suits you, and tear your enemy a new one when that suits you. "Keep them guessing" might be the motto inscribed over every church door. The trouble I see these days, though, is that christians are more and more ignoring the Jesus part (except the mechanical element of human sacrifice on the cross, of course) and finding the teachings of the Old Testament preferable to the teachings of their sacrificial victim himself. Divorce runs amok among christians even though Jesus doesn't allow it. Tea Party christians don't want to pay their taxes even though Jesus says to pay your taxes. Christians are often first in line to call for "nuking" the bad guys when Jesus says not to nuke the bad guys, or words to that effect.

During this time of the year, you will hear that tired old motto: Keep Christ in Christmas. Maybe you'll hear this one, too: Jesus is the Reason for the Season. Both make my eyes roll involuntarily, but keep in mind that christians, and usually the most vociferous ones, are drinking their holiday punch watered down. They make excuses for the teachings of Jesus and why he was ~~wrong~~ misinterpreted. So when you hear the christians huffing and puffing about Jesus, just remind yourself that they don't care any more for Jesus than we atheists do. It's all just Christmas smoke.

The one about the plumbing

2010-12-09T07:55:00.000+09:00

Have I moved to a new address? Unfortunately, no. Korea has been revamping its address system for the postal service, and our building's new address was tacked on to the house a while back. I've been seeing this for years in the larger cities, and I just assumed it was another adventure in futility since nobody knows their "new" address even if it was assigned and posted years ago. The utility companies use the old address system. When I registered my motorbike, the precinct office wanted the old address. Under the old system, neighborhoods and towns were divided up into what we might call "blocks", and each block is assigned a number. Business or housing units within the block were assigned an additional number. My neighborhood is called "Yonggang". My block in that neighborhood is number 1358. My building is number 10. Easy, eh? Well, now they've started naming streets. Of course, nobody knows the name of the street they live on, because street names weren't part of life before. So, here's my new address using the street names system: My street is Sogeumgang Road 29th Street, house number 7. Smaller streets are named as adjuncts to larger streets, so if you know the name of the large street nearby, your little street will be named after it with a number to indicate which little street it is. The big street a block away is Sogeumgang Road (named after the nearby hill). I'm on the 29th street off that road. I could get used to it, I suppose.

Speaking of housing, I got up one morning a few days ago to find excess water on my kitchen floor. The cloth I put down in front of the sink was sopping wet; the under-floor heating had evaporated most of the rest, though. I thought I had just been too messy while washing dishes the night before, but yesterday, I noticed the wood on the kitchen floor was buckling a little. The amount of water needed to do that was more than I ever spill washing dishes, so my curiosity was piqued. Something happened, but the cabinet under my sink was bone dry, so it wasn't a leak in my plumbing. Later, I noticed this sign out in the foyer:

It is not clear what the meaning is. On the surface, it basically says the water tank broke and got into the electrical stuff in the wall. Be careful. Then some scribbling that I can't decipher, and then the cost of repairing, but not sure exactly what was repaired or why I have to know that and the cost. The water tank floater is propped up there with an arrow that says "Look". No indication who wrote it, though.

For thirteen years I've lived in a mystery novel. This is just the latest example of what it's like to live here and try to piece together stories and information from people whose culture doesn't like them speaking bluntly or directly. Every day I have to follow their circular thought patterns round and round until I get an idea of what's going on, and then half the time my conclusions are wrong.

The one about the Myth of Christ

2010-12-03T16:25:00.000+09:00

Since I don't watch TV anymore, it seems kind of strange, perhaps, that my favorite mug is the one I got at CNN Center last summer. Let me assure you, however, that I only got it for its size and sturdiness, not the company it represents!

But since the topic of CNN came up, I found a clip from CNN on YouTube about the atheist billboard that went up in New Jersey. The interviewer talked to the president of the American Atheists and to the head of the Catholic League, Bill Donohue. Donohue complained, "Are we just pinatas? Are we going to accept this kind of thing as a doormat?" The implication being that you can throw up any piece of trash on a billboard (and we've all seen some pretty racy billboards) or any religious message we want or any charitable group's message, or virtually anything, but no way can we allow atheists to express themselves. There it is in a nutshell. Religion wants complete and unquestioned acceptance by everyone in society while non-believers are forced to defend themselves and their public rights from an onslaught of religious hysteria.

Honest christians are becoming more and more aware that the Christmas myth is much, much older than their particular cult's version. The story of Jesus was lifted from earlier myths, and the story of the virgin birth of a god is so old nobody knows when or where it actually first started.

Yes, there is nothing original in christianism. It is only the latest christ myth out of many. Sure, it feels good to believe it. It's kind of satisfying in a puerile way, but the human mind cannot be fooled for long unless we deliberately choose to do so. Christ is a myth, but that doesn't mean we can't have a load of good cheer and fun during midwinter! I don't care whether you call the virgin-born god Attis, Dionysus, Osiris, Jesus, or Mithra, or whether you call the day Victory of the Sun, Birthday of Sol Invictus, Christmas, or Haloea. I don't care what you believe or the names they go by. No, really, I don't. So, I won't say your billboards are offensive if you won't say mine are just because the message is different. It's only fair to want the same consideration in return. Can you do that for me?

The one where the wind comes whistling through the panes

2010-11-28T10:41:00.000+09:00

I got up this morning and read the outside temperature as 38°F (3°C). That's the lowest I have seen so far, and it's depressing. But it's Korea, so having the windows closed doesn't necessarily mean the cold wind stays outside. The window and door sealing products industry does a brisk business, pardon the pun, during the initial shock of winter. Korean construction techniques are probably the worst in the world north of the 30th parallel. They are shoddy, unsafe, and wasteful. My friends and I often shake our heads when even the simplest room isn't square or plumb and floors crown or tilt. Windows are placed in buildings where the openings vary in size so much that even an extra tube of silicon putty isn't enough to seal some of them. That is one of the drawbacks of their poured concrete method of building walls and floors. In come the sealant products to the rescue. Even our Homeplus, as small as it is, sticks three racks of sealant products in the middle of an aisle because they are guaranteed sales.

In 12 years, I have seen little let-up to the deplorable construction methods here. Buildings have stopped falling down, though, so I suppose there has been some improvement in oversight. Unscrupulous construction company owners would often scrimp on concrete quality to line their pockets leading to the deaths of innocent people when the bridge or store or housing unit collapsed. It's probably only a matter of time before bribes reach the necessary level to allow for that again. The public, instead of demanding better quality construction techniques, simply do what they've always done, take it in the ass and say "Thank you", then go spend too much money on temporary fixes every year that allow them to sit in their homes with a modicum of comfort.

Why don't they stand up to the construction companies and demand better quality or better building techniques? Because Koreans seem to believe that they are powerless against such huge forces. They are not a people of individual independence, ambition, or resolve. They are not the kind of people who see a problem and independently make a point to take it on and solve it. They are not the kind of people who see trash on a public floor and pick it up to throw it away. They do not see themselves as actors within the play of society. They are passive and prefer to lie low hoping to be overlooked by the terrible forces of life swirling about them. Not all, but many, enough to create a national characteristic of acquiescent docility. They are also fanatical about Korea appearing better than it really is. They ignore problems and go out of their way to cover them up. If Korea can save face by filling its country with jerrybuilt crap, so be it. However, it's impossible to hide their characteristics from us who live here. A Korean might break into tears reading this and wish I would leave their country and never come back because I say such "hateful" things. An independent thinker, a grown-up, would read this and say, "It's true" and try to do something, anything, to make things better. Not to please foreigners, but to please themselves. To make their own lives more comfortable, to save money in the long run, to enjoy good buildings that last more than a few years, to be able to say, "We do things right and we're proud of it."

The one about dignity

2010-11-16T11:36:00.000+09:00

People in my profession, teaching English to speakers of other languages, we sometimes find the right place and settle in, sometimes we just drift from country to country. Maybe it depends on one's age, I don't know, personal disposition maybe, but I have been in Korea now for over 12 years. That isn't to say I don't fantasize about the liberty of youth who think little of hopscotching around the globe teaching in whatever countries they want or can. I do. Anyone in this profession who isn't married to a Korean more than likely dreams of wandering to other lands every so often. We aren't paid as well as Korean English teachers, of course, and we're not respected for what we do, but it's a peaceful country with generally nice people who pretty much leave us alone to pursue our various pastimes. It grows on you. The initial shock of their lifestyle fades after a few weeks. The garish town life and piles of trash become the accepted norm.

The constant noise (of all kinds) was hard to handle at first, and health suffers from the tension it creates. However, you can learn how to deal with it, to accept it, to let it run in the background without affecting you mentally or physically, if you want to. A lot of people come here to teach, but don't figure out how to handle the filth, the noise, the tasteless neon, the dirty air, and the lack of space. They usually end up leaving before their time, and I don't blame anyone who does that. Few people help foreigners adjust to the unusual world of Korea, and when the foreigner cannot handle the craziness on his own, he has no choice but to leave in order to salvage his health and well-being. I understand that. I have almost left a couple times myself just to get my mind back from the brink. On the outside, it seems like a dishonest thing to do, to leave before your time, but from a human point of view, it's sometimes the right thing to do. The Koreans often bring this on themselves, so I have little sympathy for their plaints against those who choose to leave. We are not going to "become Korean" just because we are in their country. They are not going to get run-of-the-mill people to come here. People who go to live and work in other countries are not a common breed. There is something a little unconventional about us from the start. We are braver than many. We value our freedom. We are curious. We are willing to learn. But, we will not sacrifice our dignity indefinitely.

The one where christianity disproves itself

2010-11-08T11:39:00.002+09:00

This is from ProfMTH on YouTube. He outlines one of the points about the cult of christ that got me re-thinking my commitment to this nonsense several years back now. He uses examples of some christian sects, but there are so, so many who declare Jesus as the son of god, but these believers are divided, sometimes violently, among themselves. My own former faith, the Anglicans, have been dividing over their views of the bible lately, a collection of literature that should surely be ignored by intelligent people. Many other sects have divided over a lot less. Believers in christ must see that this division is contrary to the teachings of their magic book, but they persist in it anyway. The bible says that you must believe that Jesus is the son of god in order to be saved, yet each sect has decided to add something more to the requirement, to expand on that simple notion. They decided not to associate with those who don't like their new take on things. They sometimes fight those who disagree. They excommunicate or ostracize people who haven't quite bought the sect's point of view completely. The very proof that the cult of christ is wrong is in the people who claim it as their own.

The one with the battery

2010-11-07T14:28:00.000+09:00

For about a month I've been having to push start my motorcycle. At work, parking on a hill helps, but at home, on level terrain, well, let's just say I left out a note to my loved ones every morning in case I had a heart attack trying to start my bike. However, yesterday was free and I went in to have the oil changed and the battery looked at. And he said I needed a new battery, but since he had just put one in last March, he didn't charge me for the new battery.

I was fascinated to see the process of preparing a battery and installing it in the bike. They take this package of liquid, unseal it, and stick it in the holes in the case. (Rob tells me over my shoulder that it is distilled water.) Then they hook it up to an electrical current to charge it, and it goes under the seat. What you can't learn by observing, eh?

Today for lunch, I whipped up some meat pies since Rob was up visiting from Busan and I try to have something Western when he visits.
It actually tastes pretty good, if I do say so myself... and I do.

The one about the Constitution

2010-10-23T15:20:00.001+09:00

Like fundamentalist christians who read the bible as literal, the very words of God committed to paper and ink, the new right has taken to reading the U.S. Constitution the same way. They nitpick about this passage and that passage the same way they do about selections of the bible that prove troublesome to them. They blame "the media" (their convenient whipping boy) for interpreting the Constitution differently than they do despite the long record of justices both conservative and liberal performing that almost thankless task. And why have justices been interpreting the Constitution for us these last 220 years? Because the Constitution says they have to. How ironic.

The framers of the Constitution, if their personal papers are any indication of the thoughts that went into it, expected the Constitution to be changed as time went along. Not a one of them seemed to think the document was a static organ of state handed down from Olympus or Heaven or wherever your favorite deities reside. You don't really have to read their personal papers to learn that, though, since the principle of change is built into the Constitution itself. It outlines how the document can be altered and amended. If it weren't meant to be changed, then why would they include directions on how to change it?

The Constitution is not the bible for our government. It's simply the agreed-upon source of law for the United States. It was argued over and hammered into existence by men whose goal was to create a union of several states working together under a central coordinating government. It was designed to maintain the autonomy of the states but also create the means for these states to cooperate in harmony for the good of the entire nation. It has not always been successful, and those times of failure have required people of good intention to try to repair the deficiency. I'm disheartened when I hear Tea Party loyalists insisting that this branch of government or that President "return" to the Constitution or "start following" the Constitution. Then it dawns on me that these Tea Party folks don't know anything about the Constitution, its purpose, place, or history, like they slept through social studies classes and civics courses, if they actually studied it at all.

A return to the "original" Constitution would mean no Bill of Rights. It would mean a black man would only legally count as three-fifths of a man. Non-whites would be denied the vote. Women would be unable to vote. Involuntary servitude would be legal. 18- to 20-year olds would definitely be unable to vote, including our soldiers, even though they are risking their lives for our country. Is that what the Tea Party devotees really want? Personally, I don't think they know what they want. Almost everyone in America is feeling left out and marginalized, but it isn't because of misreading the Constitution. It's because the richest 10% of the nation is pulling the strings on us citizen puppets. The middle class and poor are dancing to the tune of the plutocrats who rule our country from secret back rooms.

The uneducated and undereducated masses of Americans don't have the acumen or wherewithal to know everything that's happening in the upper reaches of ~~Mount Olympus~~ Wall Street. They just know something is wrong. They want to have a voice. So they blame teachers not leading children in prayer at school. They blame the courts for not siding with their religious doctrines. They blame science for not teaching mythology as fact. They blame condoms. They blame gays. They blame Canada. They blame Mexico. They blame Europe. They blame whatever is different now than it was a hundred years ago as though life had been better in "the good ol' days." The United States chose the path of individual liberty over social responsibility a long time ago. American individuals wanted to be able to do whatever the hell they felt like and damned be anyone who got in the way. There is a price to pay for this socially irresponsible free-for-all. It means any Jack, Jill, or Johnny can start a tax-free business called a church and bilk the suckers who join out of their livelihoods. It means a bank can charge whatever it wants in interest no matter how crushing the weight. It means a railroad company can take your farm without paying a fair market price for it. It means a city can take your house and land to sell to a private business enterprise. It means a food chain can pour bleach on its ham and sell it as edible. It means gas rises to three dollars a gallon while oil executives enjoy "unexpected windfalls" from gas sales. It means corporations in America pay nothing in corporate taxes decade after decade because of the generous loopholes granted by Congress. But more insidiously, it also means that our governing oligarchs will rake in billions of dollars of profit on the backs of the American working poor while Congressmen and Judges enjoy luxurious holidays abroad for greasing the wheels of law and justice in favor of the plutocracy.

No, it isn't the Constitution. It's just us. I hope America will continue to correct the mistakes of its past and move toward democratic social responsibility. Like everything else on earth, America is evolving little by little, and it's scaring people. Good.

Photos:
obamaconspiracy.org
rubylane.com

The one about plutocrats

2010-10-08T19:39:00.000+09:00

I just saw Art Robinson, a kook running for Congress from Oregon on the Republican ticket, on Rachel Maddow's TV show. If that guy is one of the sane Republicans, then there is no hope for them. He just sat there yelling at the interviewer instead of talking about anything meaningful or responding to questions. Of course, he's playing to the glee of his half-wit supporters, but still, he could at least be a gentleman and pretend to be interviewed. I was so disgusted by that arrogance, I am glad I don't live in his state, or he'd be getting a stern letter from me. A man who aspires to public office and can't be relied upon to stay civil and answer reasonable questions before an international audience is unfit for public office. But that standard fell by the wayside a long time ago, I suppose. The United States has always been a land of money-grubbing politicians fawning over the wealthy plutocrats at whose teats they suckle, but there were codes of honorable public behavior in days past. You can be passionate without being rude. You can extol the virtues of your beliefs without denying the same to others. You can guide interviews toward your points without yelling at the interviewer. The longer I live, the more disgusted I am with the rich, with big business, with Republicans, and with religion. It all turns my stomach.

The one with a flip

2010-09-24T14:41:00.000+09:00

Like most people, sometimes I'm patient and sometimes I'm not. There are times when I'm not patient, but I put on a good show to appear patient, and sometimes, oddly enough, I'm actually patient but appear impatient to onlookers. Go figure.

One of the most striking cultural characteristics of the Koreans is their seemingly total lack of patience. Their very language gives a hint. Movement and action almost invariably include the word for "quickly." "Quickly do!" "Quickly come!" Even when there isn't the real need, perceived need, or even hint at urgency in the situation. When I first came to Korea in 1997, there were no number slips at the bank to determine who got to see a teller next; everybody simply struggled for the teller's attention, pressing against the counter like European soccer fans on game day. The same was true in the market where you physically had to stand your ground to get your purchases added up and pay the bill against the press of those competing for the clerk's attention.

Most of my close brushes with death in this country have been on account of not my impatience, but that of the natives. Behind the wheel of a vehicle or sitting on a motorbike, what pretense at patience they might possibly have is disregarded more than ever. While riding my motorcycle to work, there is a sharp curve in a one-way section of the road. Behind me today, a taxi appeared, and I could see that he had no fare, but he did his best to try to squeeze by me on my left as we went round this sharp curve in a cramped place in the roadway. I came to a stop forcing him to stop, too, since there was no room for him to go by me and proceeded to show him with my left hand how I felt about his impatient risk of my life. For good measure I showed him my right hand, too, as I got ready to pull away. He was not happy that he had to come to a stop and see such vulgarity, especially from a foreigner and one on a motorcycle no less, nearly the bottom of the social ladder. Was I impatient? Obviously not since I was willing to stop. I was angry, and I consider someone else risking my life because his culture is so treacherous to be worth a little display of anger now and again. Does it do any good? Not in the least. Koreans have this knack of dismissing anything that is not of them, not of their culture, not customary, not "our", as they say. I'm mindful that my anger is futile, but isn't there some therapeutic value in expressing oneself? Death and maiming are not pleasant things, I'm sure. So long as these are possibilities at the hands of the "quickly" culture, I'm all for free expression.

The one about Korean Hierarchy

2010-09-18T11:32:00.000+09:00

Korean society is marked by its innate sense of social status. In order to interact with others fluidly, you need to understand what the social status is of others. Over the millennia, the Korean language itself developed levels of speech to indicate the relationship to the people they are talking to and even the people they are talking about in some instances. The structure of language evolves according to the social structure in which it lives, and that explains why two similar societies like Japan and Korea have similar language structures, but whose languages are completely unrelated to each other.

It is unsurprising, therefore, to see the Korean social structure reflected in other aspects of life beyond language. Car ownership here has increased exponentially over the last twenty years. The car driving culture is quite young, but the need for order on the public roads is as pressing as anywhere else. There are traffic laws, of course, and these provide a basic framework in which to operate. Drive on the right hand side of the roadway, turn your lights on at night, and use your wipers when it's raining. However, beyond those fundamentals, most other behavior on the road is dictated by social mores and cultural traditions.

Just as in general society, social status on the road is important to the well-ordered lifestyle of the Korean people. There is a hierarchy of people; and there is a hierarchy of traffic. Not all vehicles are equal, and I'm not talking about emergency vehicles. Emergency vehicles are, unfortunately, not on the top of the social hierarchy of the roadway. Expensive cars indicate a higher social status for the driver and occupants. Therefore, a pricey car takes precedence over a cheaper car. An SUV takes precedence over a sedan as does also a twelve-seater caravan. Taxis and busses are, however, almost the top of the hierarchy on a Korean roadway. Only construction vehicles like cement trucks are higher. Hence, busses and taxis are exempt from most traffic laws and use their status to bully dominance at traffic lights and other intersections where they are not obliged to obey red lights or stop signs. After four, six, and eight-wheeled vehicles come motorcycles. Two-wheeled vehicles are lumped together in one category which means an 1800cc Yamaha Roadliner is no different than a 50cc scooter as far as the Korean roadway hierarchy goes. All two-wheeled vehicles are so low on the social ladder as to be banned on all expressways in the country. The only thing lower in social status are bicycles and pedestrians.

The implications for this are rather predictable for folks who can see more than a couple seconds into the future. Car crashes abound in Korea simply because one person feels he is a higher social status than the other guy and tries to exert his dominance while the other guy is thinking exactly the same thing. Two egos cannot occupy the same piece of road at the same time. When turning into traffic, you don't assess how closely and how quickly the cross traffic is approaching; you assess their social status and pull into traffic or sit still accordingly. A car arriving at a crossroads will see a motorcycle approaching from a distance of thirty meters. Since the motorcycle is a lower social status, the car will pull out in front of the motorcycle obliging the rider to veer out of his lane or make a hard stop to avoid a collision. There is no fault as the car obviously outranks the motorcycle. The same is true up the social ranking system of vehicles with busses and taxis barely stopping at crossroads, if at all, since few other vehicles outrank them.

This system of social hierarchy is the guiding principle for driving in Korea. It affects every driving situation you can imagine, but it seems to remain favorable in the eyes of the Korean public despite its drawbacks.

The one with the Amish

2010-09-12T13:47:00.001+09:00

I saw a sign on the news being held by someone demonstrating against the Islamic Center in New York: "Ground Zero Mosque: Religion Preying on Freedom." Of course, adherents of Islam would disagree, but that's to be expected. Religion does something to the mind that alters its perceptions. The English word 'religion' evolved more than likely from a Latin word that indicated obligation, dependence, and binding. Islamic cultists themselves describe their faith as one of submission, a suitable synonym for dependence and binding. But the concept is not foreign to the christian cult: "God opposes the proud, but gives grace to the humble. Submit yourselves therefore to God." (Letter of James). I will not elaborate on the humbleness of today's modern mega-preachers (or even the humbleness of small-time pastors in Gainesville, Florida) or the humbleness of the politicians being spewed up from among the christ cultists around the country, only to say that a wry grin often crosses my face, and sometimes a slow shake of the head.

"Religion preying on Freedom." Someone asked me once why I don't support independence for Tibet, and my response was, I oppose any attempt of a religion to establish a state. Religion is dangerous enough without giving it such immense power over the lives of millions of people and reserving the halls of law and justice for only those who adopt an orthodox religious point of view, whatever that religion is. Yes, religion preys on freedom. The religious concede that a believer sacrifices his or her freedom, but the sacrifice is to a beneficent being of ultimate wisdom and power. How could you turn that down? It's the perfect freedom, they say. Yet, my observation is that God does not personally direct the affairs of the world. Just a cursory view will show that if anyone is in charge, he or she is a complete incompetent. The usual counter by believers is that the world is in chaos because we haven't all submitted to God's grace and peace. But the chaos I see is among devout religious people, not unbelievers! How can you explain that? It seems, just looking at the observable world around me, that submission to God increases agitation. It provokes hateful words. It incites angry outbursts.

About the only religious people I can find that are not filled with simmering rage and malcontent are the Amish. If all religious people were like the Amish, you would probably never hear a peep from us atheists! The Amish live their own lives not bothering others, not infused with the need to change the world and impose the Old Testament on everyone. They choose to live according to their faith, and if others don't choose that route, so be it. It doesn't affect their faith in the least to have non-believers for neighbors, senators, governors, judges, sheriffs, and so forth. Their faith does not depend on making sure it is dominant in the world or even in the nation. Their faith is strong even without the force of congress behind it, probably because they believe that their God is actually all powerful and in control, quite unlike the new God of the modern Islamic or Christ cults Who just can't get enough people to pray in public without having to pass laws forcing it on them. Just looking around, I get the impression that the overtly religious, those politicians and mega-pastors who want to make their religion the law of the land, they probably harbor fears which impel them to enslave others so as to make themselves feel better, creating the camaraderie of the damned, so to speak. If these rising religious politicians and mega-pastors had a faith that matched in strength that of the Amish, they would run for office and preach positively instead of the negative attempts to bring unbelievers under the yoke of christ no matter what. I don't care what your religion is, if you have one at all; I do care whether you are competent to lead. Your single issue stances, be it immigration, gay rights, medical abortion, or tax breaks for billionaires do not make you qualified to lead. I'd rather have a person I don't agree with on my pet issue, if that person is competent, than to have a sycophant in congress or the state capitol who has to make all his or her decisions based on which way the winds of religion are blowing that day. Your faith is irrelevant to my life just so long as you make sure it is irrelevant. The moment you start insisting that your cult's little view of the world should be enshrined in law that affects me, then we have a problem.

Yeah, religion preys on freedom, and that's why any candidate in these midterms who touts his or her faith will not get my vote. I love my freedom, and I'm not about to hand it over to a bunch of spirit-filled bootlickers.

The one with the Recovery Act

2010-09-05T12:56:00.000+09:00

Someone posted an Ann Coulter article on Facebook in which she was chastising the radical far right for calling the President a Muslim. “He's not a Muslim; he's an atheist” was basically her article. I got the biggest kick out of that, mainly because she really intended to be insulting to the President, but to me, I only wish he were atheist. We haven't had an atheist president as far as I know, at least not one who was honest about it. So I made a video about the word “atheist.”

Ann Coulter is not stupid, but she says deliberately stupid things mainly to whip up her crowd into a mindless frenzy. Now Saint Glenn Beck is jumping on the bandwagon. Did you hear about his rally in the capital? “Restoring Honor” he called it. Of course, the only way you can say that is if you believe America has lost its honor. And the only way I can see in the last decade that America has lost its honor would be the unprovoked invasion and conquest of a (near) third-world country under false pretenses after lying to the U.N. about intelligence on said country.

Attempting to get medical insurance for more Americans, however, seems to be Beck's idea of losing honor. Asking the rich to sacrifice for the nation by returning to the former tax rates also seems to be our loss of honor. Keeping the states from defaulting by means of the Recovery Act must also be a loss of honor, since he rants against that, too. My county in Michigan received 669,000 dollars from the Recovery, and that meant the difference between a complete meltdown of police, sheriff, fire, schools, and emergency services and giving the local councils some breathing space to reorganize. Of course, we all know that the economy started tanking because Bush was dumping trillions of borrowed dollars into his phony war in Iraq, and that “war” in Afghanistan that he kept simmering on the back burner sending up billions of dollars in smoke every month because he's... an idiot? … malicious? … unconcerned with our military? … more interested in punishing Sadam than Bin Laden? Bush's policy caused this Great Recession and it's high time the radical right faced up to it. Screaming slogans and waving signs is not patriotism as much as giving more in taxes to pay for the war effort you so loudly acclaim. Actions speak louder than words, and these anti-tax buffoons are demonstrating on a daily basis by their unwillingness to shell out bucks for the war (that they supported) that they don't really give a shit about the war, the country, our soldiers, or our national solvency. Tea Party? No, just another bunch of spoiled white entitlement crybaby hypocrites.

Images:

newsone.com

themoderatevoice.com

The one where friends need restraining

2010-08-22T10:54:00.001+09:00

Have you ever been out with friends, well, men probably have experienced this more than women, but you never know. You're out with friends, and maybe you all have been drinking, and one of your friends sees something he takes offense at and starts in to teach the offender a lesson. And you and the others try to dissuade him from making a fool of himself, yet he persists, so you and the others try to restrain him from his intent. Your friend maybe gets angry at you and snaps at you and might even take a swing at one or more of you because you have violated his ethics. He thinks that dude over there needs to be taught a lesson, and you aren't letting your buddy go over there and teach it to him. The end result can go either way. He might break free and proceed to make a fool of himself by trying to "straighten out" the offending individual, with success falling nowhere near perfect, or you might succeed in restraining him from that dangerous outcome. That's kind of how I feel about christians in the United States.

Though they believe they are defending American society, they are introducing innovations that contradict the body of experience garnered by the American people over the last 400+ years on this continent. They are gleefully ripping to shreds the core principles of the Republic founded by people who wanted freedom without coercion. The fundamentalists say that those who do not submit to the precepts of their religion are exercising undue pressure on them to abandon their religion, because the modern christian right equate the nation with their religion. They see no division between state and religion, and this is because they read the Hebrew Scriptures (“Old Testament”) as a literal blueprint for a successful and blessed society. Not following the Hebrew Scriptures results, in their minds, to the destruction of the nation by the same vengeful god of the bible who dismantled the Jewish nation at least twice. The rest of us have varying opinions on this ranging from “we've got to stop these maniacs” to “don't hit them too hard.” We're the friends who are trying to hold back another friend from making an ass of himself. The christian right are hell-bent to rip this country to shreds. You can see it all around. The polarization did not start with the liberal left. Anyone who knows what liberals stand for knows that we do not like polarization. We want a diverse society of people who enjoy their differences yet respectfully allow others to choose different paths. We liberals want a society where people can present their viewpoints as options, not edicts. Our resistance to the right is not polarization; it's the desire for self-determination. We are not the ones who say “Come out from among them, and be ye separate, saith the Lord, and touch not the unclean thing.” The radical right has removed all pretense at reconciliation or tolerance. Those of us who are trying to talk sense into our out-of-control friends are being attacked as the problem, as people who have abandoned morality, because we don't let the religious right take over and “set things straight”. Religious people: sleep it off! If you had your way, you'd be sorry for it within a month.

The bar fight picture I can't find the creator, but I tried. The cartoon is from Atheist Eve at yoism.org.

The one where I mock jingoism.

2010-08-04T05:27:00.000+09:00

There is a competition waged in America lately, a subtle combat gone virtually unnoticed even though its effects appear on jacket lapels, lawn ornaments, bumper stickers, and flagpoles across the country. Who can wear the biggest or best pin? Who can squeeze one more sticker on the car? Who is the most patriotic by flying the biggest flag in town? I'm half expecting some community to start remodeling rooftops so that they create a large American flag effect when seen from above. It wouldn't surprise me in the least.

At last, I have grown accustomed to tipping again. No longer do I walk out of the restaurant without dropping a few dollars extra on the table for the waitress. However, tipping might be getting a little out of hand when a drive up coffee kiosk wants a tip for...
for...
for what exactly is this little tip bucket dangling here in front of me?

My visit to America is drawing to a close. As usual, I'm reluctant to leave, but simultaneously anxious to get home. My travel bags are stuffed with goods unavailable in Korea, and I've said most of my good byes. It was a good holiday for the most part, but I will certainly be happy to get back to my home, sleep in my own bed, and cuddle my sweet little kitties again.

The one where the wild calls

2010-07-27T09:25:00.001+09:00

The differences between Atlanta and the back woods of Michigan are rather stark. It's cooler here, though the Michiganians think it's sweltering for some reason. There are a lot fewer people in Michigan. And there is no internet connection out "on the farm". It isn't really a farm, but that's what I call it. 25 acres in the country is a farm to me, I don't care what crops they don't grow.

I enjoy my visits, however. It's so different from what customs I've cultivated in Korea. Without internet, I can't watch videos, check my mail, read a blog, or any of several other activities that have become so commonplace to me over the last 13 years. Meals are on a schedule and consist of plain country fare with fruits and vegetables harvested and canned the previous year, unadorned meats, rough

hewn bread and a tall glass of water drawn straight from the tap but tasting like a mountain spring.

After a homemade dessert of pie or cake or even sometimes ice cream, we gather in front of the television to watch the evening news followed by either an Agatha Christie story or Red Green. We banter lively and test our theories about who Hercule Poirot will finger, or we laugh heartily at the antics of the Possum Lodge!

Bedtime comes early, about 10:30, maybe 11 if there's something especially interesting on the TV. Dawn breaks as we awake the next morning. The window is open, and the sounds of the breeze in the poplars, the birds collecting their breakfast, and Jack sipping his coffee on the back deck drift into my little bedroom off the garage.

I'm jealous of them, the people who live this life every day of every year. I doubt I could be totally happy living this way all the time, but for this summer, it is the most wonderful place on earth.

Next week I return home, and though it's a world away, I hope that a little bit of my stay in the Michigan countryside will follow me down the road to Korea.

The one where a shirt speaks for me

2010-07-21T08:32:00.000+09:00

The last couple weeks in America, I have noticed that there are a LOT of fat people. I'm no Twiggy, granted, and compared to Koreans, I am definitely a big guy, but here in the States, I look rather slim next to some of these folks! Maybe here is a reason:

Candy vending machines! I had forgotten about them, because I only see them here. This one looks so inviting, eh? Plus, everything you order at a restaurant here is double the size it should be. Today I got a burrito at the Raging Burrito downtown, and it was bigger than both my fists side by side! I haven't been able to finish a restaurant meal here since I arrived! What does it say about a people who eat so much while so many on earth starve to death? And it isn't that the fat Americans don't realize people are starving, it's that we seem not to care. I got mine, to hell with you. That's not right; shame on me, too.

Oh, I had a wonderfully long and friendly chat with a lady and her incompetent assistant (but a sweet gal nonetheless) about Korea, Korean money, culture, and motorcycles, the army, weather, and god only knows what else we covered. She runs a T-shirt printing shop in some mall that I came across by accident while looking for the drugstore I had dropped some film off at. I wandered into her shop while contemplating hanging around for a movie to start, and when I realized where I was, I told her I was a Democrat and I wanted a shirt to emphasize that by saying the following:

She instantly knew what I was getting at, and we had a good laugh. There's an election today, and she warned me not to wear this today in public! LOL However, I like it, and I don't mean it literally, though I'm sure some right wing radical would easily oblige me if he had the chance! Considering all the hate-filled signage we've seen from tea partiers the last year, my T-shirt is rather tame, I would say.

The one where I ate a reuben

2010-07-16T05:32:00.000+09:00

This is the motorcycle I chose to buy while I was in Georgia. I learned a lot about registering vehicles in Georgia, but I'm not upset over my mistakes with it all. Mistakes are honorable teachers and I respect them. As you might know, if I do not learn something constructive on vacation, it's a wasted vacation as far as I'm concerned. However, the bike is registerd in the state of Michigan now, or at least it's in the process of getting registered there. Next week it is being shipped to my hometown of West Branch where I will meet up with it and ride it around showing it off (it's a handsome ride) before storing it carefully for next time.

I enjoyed lunch today with Ryan, the guy I bought the motorcycle from. We signed the bill of sale and had it notarized at a UPS store in Marietta and ate Reuben sandwiches at the Marietta diner before he had to go. I am really glad fate introduced me to him. He's a good man. The Marietta Diner isn't a little Ma & Pa joint, but it's a diner, of sorts, and I got to sit at the counter, so it was just fine by me!

Joan got a job doing the windows for Sufi's, a restaurant which is scheduled to open this autumn in the Buckhead area of Atlanta. I got a shot of her doing some measurements there before she left for a week's vacation in Napa Valley.

Things have not been going as planned this vacation, but I have enjoyed the rest and relaxation available. My plans to go to Greensboro did not materialize, so I'm a little at sea about how to fill this weekend. The Waffle House museum will be open to the public this Saturday, and that is a definite MUST SEE! (I really like diners, if you didn't know that before.) Hey! That's what I can do! I can go around trying out diners around Atlanta! To the Yellow Pages!

The one where Michigan will wait

2010-07-01T19:25:00.001+09:00

An office/classroom floating in the sky is a fine setting for one of my final interviews of the semester. All the grades have been entered, and all the complaining seems over as well. Maybe my comforting and encouraging explanations satisfied the students that their grades were as fair as I could make them given the restraints of the grading curve percentages imposed on us.

Monday is my departure from Korea to the United States for a holiday. It was meant to be a visit to my family since I had received frowny faces over the last decade that I wasn't visiting often enough. However, I am apparently visiting too often now as nobody among my six siblings and 10 nephews and nieces living in Michigan nor even their adult children are willing to pick me up at the airport when I arrive. (Don't they know how generous eccentric uncles are?!) So I will be visiting the one family member who actually said she'd pick me up... in Atlanta. Therefore, I will have my holiday in Georgia and the Appalachian Mountains, and Michigan will have to wait.

The one where you can't get there from here

2010-06-15T19:25:00.000+09:00

When I got to Busan Sunday, I needed a helmet for riding on Rob's motorbike, so we swung into E-Mart and found this adorable little number. It really brings out my eyes and retarded side, I think.

Busan is a beautiful city, and according to Rob, you can drink beer right out in public! I have that American stupidity ingrained, I guess, that says you need to put your beer in a paper bag if you drink outside. What's up with that, anyway? Why do Americans have to pretend to conceal something that is so obvious as to make the whole affair ridiculous? Then again, what about America isn't ridiculous half the time? ㅋㅋㅋ

Being somewhat naive about almost everything Busan, I asked Rob to drop me off at Busan Station, the big central train station downtown, so I could catch a train home. Of course, you can't go to Gyeongju from Busan from the big central train station without going to Daegu first, then backtracking to Gyeongju, making the trip about 5 hours to go 40 miles. Needless to say, I took a bus home. Should have taken my motorbike, but everyone said the weather was supposed to turn foul, which it did not, thank you kindly all you naysaying dumbasses!

In other news, I ordered a MacBook Pro from the Apple store in Busan, and it was delivered to my home by the creepiest delivery man I have ever encountered. I'm used to Koreans being surprised when a "foreigner" opens the door to them, and I've encountered a few people so taken aback as to become temporarily speechless (in any language). However, this guy showed the usual surprise (even though my foreign name was emblazoned on the box and my door!), but then he got this twisted little grin, and his eyes roved around on me and the apartment behind me in the oddest way. I discreetly looked down to make sure all my body parts were inside my clothing and dismissed the guy politely, but quickly. Just a little weirded out. So, drum rolls please! Here is my new MacBook Pro:

She's a beaut, eh? Stay tuned for further updates about this little gal!

The one where I still can't have nice things

2010-06-07T16:53:00.001+09:00

I certainly do live up to the Raymond Family motto: "Cur non possumus bona habere?"*

I was getting on my motorcycle this morning when I just happened to see Pepper not only outside, but sneaking in between our building and the one next door! (The cats are not allowed outside unsupervised.) At first, I couldn't believe it was him, because I have a sliding glass door that separates the entryway from the rest of the house, and I distinctly remember closing it. He must have been hiding in the entryway behind boots or something and sneaked out when I went outside to go to work. So, I tried to sneak up on him to grab his tail but he took off just as I was closing my hand around his tail. I instinctively lurched forward, smashing the helmet I was wearing into the corner of the building. I would have rather gotten a black eye, though, because black eyes go away. This helmet is barely ten days old, and already it's marred.

Anyway, Pepper didn't go far, and he came to me when I started talking to him. Crisis averted.

*"Why can't we have nice things?" Thanks to the YouTuber "tenneral" for helping me with the Latin!

The one where this little piggy went to market

2010-05-26T19:26:00.000+09:00

Almost everything seems to be left up to the professional teachers in Korea. Today HomePlus was busy with children as adults (that I assume were teachers) escorted them through the store. All the children had little baskets, though the adults chose the items for them to put in their baskets. I wanted to ask what was going on, but I knew better. Whoever I asked would simply stare at me in horror, collect him/herself, then smile and scurry away. It's the usual response I get when I ask questions here.

Was it a shopping lesson? A PR moment for the store? I will probably never know.

It's probably good to be taught how to shop. My learning came with the money I pilfered from the usual locations of loose change in the average home: sofas, end tables, mother's purse, loose change spent frivolously at the dime store on plastic cars and dart pistols. I'm not a good shopper. Usually, it's in and out a single store to be done with the burdensome deed. Maybe I should have tagged along with the children today and learned just how shopping should be done.

The one where some Aussie uses a naughty word

2010-05-17T23:18:00.001+09:00

Dr. Dawkins speaks in Australia

I grew up in a home where only one person was allowed to be outspoken, and that one was defiantly religious. Any questioning or opposition to the evangelical cause was met with ridicule, scorn, screeching hatred, a flat hand to the side of the face, or a combination of any or all of these.

Religion cannot stand criticism for obvious reasons. It has no foundation. It has no solid composition. It exists only in the minds of people who simply choose to believe things that someone else has presented to them, whether they be presented face to face or presented in some medium like literature or a broadcast. To criticize religion then is to criticize the very minds of the religious. Nobody likes his intelligence questioned or her logical fallacies pointed out, but since religion is not intelligently defensible and it is fundamentally illogical, there really is no choice in the matter.

We have witnessed with our own eyes how religion can make people deranged. It can lead to the murder of physicians in women's clinics because some religion believes that a zygote is a human being. It can lead to the spread of incurable diseases because some religion believes that sex for pleasure, even with one's own wife, is a sin. It can convince uneducated men to commit murder-suicide because some religion believes killing non-believers is a virtue. And the religious always respond with, "But those are the extremists!" No, they aren't. These are the people who simply believe what their religion tells them and act upon it in good faith. They are not wild-eyed crazies; they are the faithful.

The so-called "new" atheists are speaking plainly and adamantly in the uphill struggle to help lift the world from the dark ages of religion. We ought not be children afraid of the terrors of life. We have no business reaching our arms to the sky hoping that some superman might intervene in our distress great or small. The evils of earth are our own doing, not superman's. That knowledge alone should compel each of us to awake from the slumber of religion's mind-numbing narcotic and lend our hands to the work of repair that lies before us.

The one where I hang my hat

2010-05-09T13:20:00.000+09:00

Here is the longing to "go", whatever that means to the one who yearns. Pepper just wants to go outside. I just want to go home, though men like me really have no home beyond the proverbial hat rack. The life each person lives reflects his philosophy. My life, like yours, grew from an understanding of the nature of the world, the nature of life, and what I perceive to be my place in it.

The animal Man seems torn between what He came from and what He will become, and this struggle plays itself out in each human being on every day as we make our life choices. I don't believe Man has a "destiny" that is prescribed by a god or even by Nature itself. To think that Man as He is now is the epitome of life's evolution is too arrogant for even me to believe. Life on Earth should continue for many millions of years more, and what is to come we will never know. Life arising out of inanimate matter may or may not be common in the universe, but we do know it can happen, because here we are. Life is, therefore, a naturally occurring event in this universe that is tied inexorably to the fabric of the universe.

Life, all life, everywhere, arises from the matter of the universe, which means that all life is one life no matter where it appears or in what form. I cannot make the separation between my life and your life, because you and I are the same life. That doesn't mean I can make no distinctions between the many examples of life around me, but it does lay on me a weighty responsibility to be fully aware that all life is part of me just as much as I am part of it. That responsibility is to see the consequences of my actions on others, to discern the greater good, to acknowledge in my actions that 'self' is not a real concept despite the convenience of the terminology.

The one where it sticks in my craw

2010-05-01T19:18:00.000+09:00

When you live and work in a foreign country whether long time or short, after a while, the paranoia eases, and you stop carrying your passport everywhere you go. Given enough time further and you eventually stop worrying about having your "green card" on you all the time as well. Yes, it is a law that foreigners must carry their official ID at all times, but in the 13 years I have lived in Korea, the only people that have ever asked for it are the banks when I'm wiring money to the States and the immigration people when I'm coming and going from the country. I just came back from a jog in the park, and it occurred to me that I hadn't had any ID on me at all that whole time. My first thought was, "What if I had had a heart attack and nobody knew who I am?" Then I thought about what if I was a brownskin in Arizona. Here in Korea, the police would probably just take me home where I can produce my ID, and everyone's happy. Would the cops give a brownskin me the same benefit of the doubt in Arizona and escort me home where I could prove that I am legal? My guess is I'd have to sit humiliated in a precinct hall, get fingerprinted and charged with the crime of having no ID on my person while jogging. A crime for not carrying ID-- who would have ever thought such a thing could happen in the United States?

The new Arizona law is not going to stop the flow of slaves and criminals into the State. It might catch someone here and there, but if the cops don't catch "enough", when will the organized raids start on factories and farms to catch the illegals who are working and contributing to the Arizona economy? Illegals who are doing jobs that you and I would never do are not the problem. The law makes no distinction between a hard-working illegal and the others, the slavers, the smugglers, the common criminals. The law that Governor Brewer signed will not make any resident in Arizona safer or his job more secure. Security can only come when the international border is attended to by the only body in the land that has the authority to do something, the United States Congress. Enter the hypocrite Republicans who rant and rave about "reform" in front of the TV cameras and yet vote in Congress against measures toward that very reform. Maybe there is a bright side to Governor Brewers decidedly illegal behavior, and that is those cockroach Republicans are seen scurrying around now that the light of public attention is upon them.

The one where I write about the window on the world

2010-04-27T08:23:00.000+09:00

The irony was not lost on me when my own copy of Fallout 3 arrived in the mail a few days ago with Chinese characters emblazoned across the case. Last night while I was leading an ESL discussion in Second Life about immigration, I wanted the learners to see a video from Al Jezeera television, but our Chinese learners couldn't watch it. China forbids its people to access YouTube. Of course, YouTube is the main channel of the world's silly, fun-loving side, but it's also an important expression of the world's philosophies and education. The Chinese prohibition reduces their people's view of the variety of thought and opinion, true, but it also takes away the humanity of the rest of the world. If my travels have taught me anything, it's that people are the same no matter where you go. In shielding its public from the extensive breadth of human thought and opinion, the Chinese government is also denying its people a very personal connection with the outside world. When I was in Army basic training in Alabama, we practiced on targets made to resemble Soviet soldiers. We were constantly reminded by the government's propaganda and the news media how oppressive and evil the Soviets were. It made us consider them less than human and so easier to hate and kill, if necessary. There are things on YouTube that I personally find unpalatable, but on the whole, YouTube offers mankind a grand window on human society. It makes us realize that people in Buenos Aires, Argentina, are the same as people in Bay City, Michigan or Rouen, France as well as our own hometown. We all laugh at the same things, cry at the same things, dance, sing, sleep, drink, and enjoy life the same all over the world. Shutter this window, and you are left to wonder about the outsiders your government says are dangerous. You distrust the outsiders because you have been told they are different, yet you have never seen them. They are not like us, so you must be suspicious of them. This is what makes war, and all killing, easier. You can look upon your victim as different from you and consequently less than you, because you have never seen her holding her newborn son, or cringed at him dancing in his underwear at a party, or laughed with them trying to solve a Rubik's cube. People are people, the same the world over, in spite of all attempts to dehumanize those who are not part of our tribe, our race, or our religion. YouTube shows us who our neighbors are, and thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself.

The one where I didn't mention that plastic U.S. flag

2010-04-18T09:44:00.000+09:00

   There are things about Korea I don't understand, things I don't want to understand, and, believe it or not, things I actually do understand about Korea. They are a "make do" kind of people. The local store might reserve its parking space overnight with random pieces of concrete in some plastic buckets with a broom laid between them. A car repair shop might create an entry to the street by laying some broken boards down for cars to rumble over the curb rather than refashioning the curb into a driveway. The custodian of an apartment building might tape together pieces of cardboard to make a dust pan for a broom he made of a piece of scrap and some flexible twigs.
   You cannot have a conversation with a Korean national for long before the cost of something becomes the topic of choice. The coat you're wearing, the coffee you're drinking, the vehicle you arrived in, the prices of all these things are fair subjects. They're good at remembering the prices of things, and even though I am not wealthy, after I pay for something, the amount I paid is no longer relevant. The deed is done, the money has passed from me to the seller and as far as it concerns me, it has been miraculously changed into a coat, a motorcycle, or a cup of coffee whose values to me may now differ wildly from that of the original seller, and money may no longer be the measure of value I use.
   So what of this national pastime of frugality? I think it's because they are often attached to the money itself rather than what it can do to make the eye happier, the mouth and nose sweeter, the skin more joyful, the muscles and bones more contented in themselves or in others. How people use their money tells me a lot about them. It tells me how much they value the things they use, the value they place on their work, and the worth of the people they spend time with.
   When I was in the Army, I wasn't one of those soldiers who splurged on records, fancy clothes, or went bingeing on Saturday nights after pay day, and sometimes people would often joke when they saw a moth that "Michael must have opened his wallet." However, none of the people who really knew me said that, because my friends know where my true values lie. Just because my values are not the same as others does not mean I don't use money to show what I value, though money can sometimes be a poor measure of true value. Have you never used the words "priceless" or "invaluable"?
   Money makes life better, that's true. However, if we use money only for our own selfish interests, the world sees at a glance what we really value. We are in this world together. We all evolved from the same life that so precariously emerged from the countless ages of history. We are all one life in the eyes of Nature. We have reached the stage where we no longer have to fight and kill our competitors for food. We have the ability to organize ourselves for the well-being of not just our species but all species. It depends on where our values lie, though. Do we exert our energy accruing money simply for the sake of the money? Have we made life in this 21st century so precarious still that people find money their only stable happiness? If so, then shame on us. Mammon is a fickle god to worship.

The one that doesn't count

2010-04-03T17:45:00.000+09:00

Though trees are starting to bud, and there are some hardier flowers beginning to unfold, spring is still dominated by browns and drabs here in Gyeongju. It was a beautiful day, however, for a bicycle ride to the lake.

I am reminded by the news that once again I do not count, literally, to the United States government. Yesterday was census day, but for the last three censuses I have lived abroad and have not counted. I don't know the last time I counted. My mother died on census day in 1980, so it's unclear whether my parents actually had gotten around to mailing the form back in. I'll just assume that 1970 was the last time I counted, as an eleven-year old Caucasian male in a two-parent family of modest means living on an unpaved city street in a four-bedroom, two-storey house with asbestos siding. I was somebody back then!
----------------------------------------------------------------

The flagrant sedition I have been watching unfold in the United States disturbs me. During all the dark days when the Great Idiot was President and those overlapping years when the party of Big Business controlled all of Congress, I don't remember any liberals calling for the overthrow of the government, the compelled removal of legally elected officers of state, the destruction of private property, threats on the lives of elected officials, armed marches into the capital city of the Republic, or unabashed lying about... everything. The seditionists have a barely remote chance of unraveling the established order of the American Constitution, but they may succeed in compelling the People to defend themselves, that is, the government may have to step in if chaos breaks out because of these wannabe revolutionaries. That would be regrettable since the Radicals would see that as a sign the government wants to control us, when the fact is, We the People expect our leaders to maintain order for our own safety and prosperity. Chaos benefits only those who have nothing to lose.

When considering a return to the United States to live, these are things that weigh on my mind. Man can be a dangerous animal. Our times are not shielded from danger any more than the times of the French Revolution, Kristallnacht, the Haymarket Massacre, or the segregated South. However, responsible citizens do not cower in fear because evil men raise themselves up. Evil men do not remain long when We the People stand firm in our resolve to defend the Republic against its enemies. And lest some think I am a sappy sentimentalist, let me be clear. I do not believe the government is the Republic. The government is the servant of the Republic. We the People are the Republic, and when it becomes clear that a minority wishes Us the People general ill, that minority must be contained and reformed at all costs for the well being and prosperity of All the People.

What can an ageing, gray-haired liberal do to save his country from these wolves? Alone, very little. However, if that one stands shoulder to shoulder with two, and those two stand with more, both conservative and liberal, who do not want to see this Republic fail, then it will not fail.

The one where my heart cries out

2010-03-26T17:58:00.000+09:00

I've watched from afar as hate-filled, foul-mouthed radicals grabbed their guns, figuratively and otherwise, in ignorant or feigned offense to resist the inevitable tide of human evolution. Not dispassionately, I have participated in elections and discussions, when discussions have been possible, about the need for our species to overcome its basest animal instincts and learn to cooperate for the good of us all rather than the good of only the lucky few. If I believed in any of the gods mankind has created, I might be forgiven for thinking that Man's recent history was a divine test to see whether or not we are worthy, worthy of the very gift of life itself.

Nationalism had its heyday in the 20th century, but it is far from gone. Humankind still attaches fierce loyalties to their paternal, or maternal, homelands, suspiciously paranoid, jealous, or both about any people who are not members of their group. People so given to parochial fealty will not, and perhaps they cannot, see beyond the nearsighted goals of their immediate environment, their group mythology, and their immoderate impulses. In the times of my life, I have witnessed the blossoming of greed beyond all that has ever gone before us, from big business bilking us in the marketplace to Christian prosperity evangelists robbing the gullible masses. The sense of entitlement has grown from the simple notion of a fair shake for all people to a savage scramble for the brass ring.

What is most distressing in my lifetime is the baptism of this culture of greed and entitlement into the christian faith. Though Jesus was not a real person of history, the words placed in his mouth are sometimes wise beyond the ability of his disciples to understand or accept. Meekness and peacemaking have been abandoned. My own mother said more than once, "Jesus never told us what to do after we turned the other cheek!" The implication being that after strictly fulfilling a religious duty, we are free to violate the spirit of that duty in order to satisfy our baser instincts.

The new christians have wearied of trying to convert the world to their way of life. They have failed even to convince each other of the proper way to live, so they have turned to do what the christians of the 4th century also did, plunder the government for the resources necessary to enforce their dogma on believers and non-believers alike. The current chaos created by the religious is witness of their failure. If their ideologies were worthy, people would adopt them willingly. As it is, they must turn to coercion and fear to maintain their dying religions. Though they rally against the government when the majority are not in their favor, they are thoroughly devoted to the government when they are in the majority. Honesty and fairness are now relative values. They somehow believe that they must install the kingdom of God by force rather than await the coming of their Messiah. Maybe they really don't believe that God will come to save them. Maybe it's this doubt that makes them behave so badly, to set themselves in the place of God on earth to judge mankind in God's stead. Whatever the cause, it is humanity's responsibility to not waver in the face of this onslaught, to stand firm in the knowledge that, live or die, what is right is right, and evil cannot prevail. At all costs, it must not prevail.

The one where I have had it up to here.

2010-03-20T15:37:00.000+09:00

I doubt there is anybody who knows English who would say that this sign was ready for public posting. However, with that ever-present Korean attitude of "eh, it's good enough" this sign passed muster for the National Parks Service at least without so much as an eyebrow raised, I'm certain. Any English speaker on the street could have made this sign better without even breaking stride. They could've called an English speaker on the phone and made this sign better. Yet, the Koreans continue to indulge their woeful lack of experience with their would-be second language to create near gibberish that puts them and their country in a less than favorable light. Why won't the Koreans learn English? It isn't that they can't; it's that they refuse, though furtively. Korea has been a consistent pool of work for thousands of us native English speakers for about three decades, maybe more for some. It's not in our best interest to criticize the system, but there just comes a point of exasperation where the lack of progress in adopting a useful, productive, and beneficial second language can no longer be excused or explained away. This week, I told my learners that they are no longer to say "study English." They are to say "practice English" from now on. My bully pulpit allows me the advantage of imposing penalties for the sin, and I hope to see measurable results by the end of the semester. It's that change of perspective that must take place before any progress will realize itself. They have to stop trying to master esoteric minutiae of grammar and start using the language to communicate. Perhaps they have nothing to say to the world, I don't know. That seems unlikely, but the world will never know what is in the hearts and minds of the Korean people until they grow out of their Confucian attitudes about language and make use of English to interact with the world community.

The one where I walked through the bamboo forest

2010-03-14T14:43:00.000+09:00

The struggle seems intense at times, but the final outcome is assured. Though today the clouds and chill held sway, Nature's grasp upon the frigid hilt of winter eases hour by hour.

It was a cold stroll to Mount Sogeumgang this morning, but I was rewarded with the beautiful sight of pear blossoms! Small, and not yet prevalent, they gladdened my heart nonetheless.

This afternoon is full of Super 14 rugby on the internet channel in the background as I work on lessons. Speaking of lessons, there was a serious and debilitating glitch in Second Life last Thursday when one of my groups was supposed to meet on the Grid. We all had the new viewer, the program that allows you to see and interact in Second Life; however, nobody's voice chat worked, not even mine. I zipped around to other locations trying to see if it was just my parcel or not, but it was Grid-wide. The company was apparently doing maintenance on voice just as the learners were gathering to meet, and for most, it was their first time in Second Life. How especially unfortunate for them. There was no option but to call off the meeting for another time. One of the disadvantages of being in Asia while Second Life is headquartered in California is that prime times to meet for us here are the middle of the night in California, a common time of day to do computer maintenance. Bof.

The one where it snowed when it's supposed to

2010-03-09T08:26:00.000+09:00

My apartment has no view, but I stuck my camera out the laundry room window sideways and snapped this of the neighbors'. This is about the time it snows like this every year, and you'd think I'd learn. Spring can't start until the fat snow falls.

My voice is gravely and hoarse, but I have to persevere and go teach. You can't take a day off at our university unless you go to the hospital, so if I have to get dressed to go to the hospital to sit for a couple hours, I might as well get dressed and go teach for a couple hours. The hospital and university are right next to each other. What's the difference? Last night teaching at Cypris Village (online) I didn't think I'd make it, I was so sick, but I did!

The one where I said goodbye to the Daystar

2010-03-05T16:06:00.000+09:00

Some sadness in my life: I sold my little 125cc Daelim Daystar to one of the new teachers. It was a great first bike, but she's the new teacher's first motorbike now. It was silly to keep her under a tarp all the time, so selling her was the best thing for us both. This is my last picture of her at her new home. It's a covered car park, so she's in a better location now to keep out of the rain and snow.

Last Photo

I met one of my Second Life classes in real life last evening. Most of them seemed quite excited about getting started. One learner demonstrated how to sign up for an account and download the viewer while I supervised, the class observing on the overhead computer screen projector. They "oohed and ahhed" at all the stuff you can make your avatar do. :) Monday morning at 9 I meet the other Second Life class in person and do the same intro. This whole thing was giving me stress, but after seeing the first class's positive reaction to Second Life, I think we'll end up having a lot of fun.

The one where I was reminded of Cursillo

2010-02-26T22:52:00.000+09:00

How could I have not noticed this before? The street lamps are shaped in the fashion of traditional Korean bows and arrows. Clever. (This was taken through a dirty bus window, so please pardon the poor quality.)

Much has happened lately, and more is coming. Today several of us staked our claims for desks in the new foreign teachers' offices. Instead of semi-private offices, we now do things in the open-office format with several teachers in one large room. I'm in the third floor office, which is nice, because our classrooms are right across the hall. Due to the nature of our subject, the new office format will not be conducive to meeting students without disturbing others. However, the Korean Overlords who established the new office format are not the brightest bulbs in the marquee, and I don't really care anymore. Koreans have never been serious about the teaching and learning of English, so they get what they deserve.

After a very smooth visit to the Immigration office in Daegu Wednesday in which I splurged for a new immigration card (a very nice-looking one, I might add), I walked the few blocks down to HomePlus to see if they had chicken cat food. They did not; however, I was hungry and went to the food court to get myself a very healthy and delicious meal of bulgogi bibimbap which you see here.

Against the advice of my doctor, I went for a latte at the little coffee shop next to the food court. Their creative, yet non-standard, past tense caught my eye, and lest you think it was one isolated misprint, let me assure you, it was found on every item that carried the logo. Oh, and they don't sell buns. But the coffee was good.

Tomorrow is our all-day faculty meeting. The newbies start early in the morning, and the rest of us will join them at 1 PM for several hours of... something. Of course, the agenda of the meeting is a big, fat secret for no apparent reason. It's like Cursillo with all the secretive, mysterious malarkey that drove me nuts in the church. I guess I just like plain, logical, straightforwardness. The surreptitious intrigue that surrounds almost everything that affects us bugs me.

The one where I am a little cynical

2010-02-19T21:57:00.000+09:00

Today I took the bike out for the first time in a long time, but had to push start it, of course. It's cold. Over at the university the workers were still doing their thing. This guy was scrapping the only good desks we had in our classrooms. If they do the typical Korean thing, they'll toss these and keep those clunkers that are too big and bulky for the room and the huge chairs that don't fit under them with two students per desk (makes exams fun to proctor).
Oh, don't be so cynical! They might just buy proper desks that are useful for English conversation classrooms....
ROTFLMAO! Sorry, couldn't keep a straight face with that one. I don't gamble, but when it comes to Korean behavior, you can't lose betting on them doing the opposite of what they ought to do. Guaranteed win.

I have the skeleton and even some sinews attached for my spring Second Life conversation course. Today I got a website up for the course and posted several how-to videos for the learners. Hard work, but honest work.

The one where I see about my external hard drive

2010-02-17T09:30:00.002+09:00

Possibly our first spring day yesterday, the homeless in Daegu were out enjoying the moderate weather and playing a traditional Korean card game.

Nearby the TV network MBC was setting up for some outdoor show. At their truck they were charging up some hand-held cameras, so my guess is they planned to wander around talking to the people on the street. Either that or one of their stupid gag shows. God, those are tiring to watch.

At the Apple dealers in Daegu, the fix-it guy hooked up my external hard drive to his computer, and, of course, it worked just fine. It was rather embarrassing, and the Apple clerks smiled the smile of "what a dope" in my direction, but at home, the drive will not show up on my system. So there's something wrong with something else. More tinkering, but I fear another trip to the dealer's will have to take place. Fortunately, I have a Mac Mini, so I can just slip the computer in my pocket for the trip.

Though I had taken a morning bus to Daegu to take advantage of the more liberal bus schedules, I wanted to enjoy riding the leisurely train home, so for the return trip I went to Dong Daegu train station. It was a mad house and there were no seats back to Gyeongju, only standing tickets. Apparently the New Years holiday travel spilled over into a fourth day for a lot of folks. However, good old reliable Geumho Bus Lines across the street had plenty of room for me.

UPDATE.....

I removed the outer shell around the external hard drive, and now it works... a little. It won't stay connected long, but at least it works a little as long as it's out of its shell. If anyone can tell me why, I'd be very interested!

The one where the snow stuck around more than a few minutes

2010-02-13T13:33:00.001+09:00

So it finally snowed in Gyeongju enough to notice and stuck long enough to get some photos! This is Cheonggang Temple near my place around noon today. Yes, I am well aware that the "folks back home" are used to snow, but are they used to Buddhist temples in snow? Hmm?

The sun was playing keep away with the clouds, but he did manage a few moments on some distant hills. The cats seem fascinated by the drippy sounds of it all turning to liquid outside this afternoon. At least I hope that drippy sound is outside.

Today is the start of the holiday New Years weekend. From force of habit, I stocked up on essentials (read: spring water and bread), but the last few years, it's become apparent that some stores are always open no matter. Good ol' corner markets!

Have a great New Years weekend one and all!

The one where I recount my ordeal

2010-02-10T20:06:00.000+09:00

Actually, if I told you everything that my body has involuntarily done the last two days, you'd become what I was, and I wouldn't wish that on anyone. Suffice it to say that at about a quarter to 8 Monday evening I had a stomach ache, and an hour later I would have been willing to shoot myself had I a gun. Yes, it was that horrible. However, I survived, and this afternoon, though still a bit wonky, I took a short trek to the bakery for some crusty bread. What little I had eaten on Monday never got a chance to digest unfortunately, and even though I still have no appetite, I know I must eat something. It was rainy, a perfect backdrop to the misery of my unstable frame, but the baker had prepared for my arrival with this obstacle course you see in the photo. My choices were: try to step on these upturned bread trays and get in this bakery or cross the street to the other bakery. Either could have easily done me in considering every muscle in my body felt achingly undependable. I risked the bread trays route and managed not to fall over. I instinctively answered "no" to everything the baker asked me until I had the crusty bread in hand, tucked in my slicker, and was on my way home again. Force of habit, I stood outside the motorcycle shop and watched them for a minute or two wishing I knew how to fix motorcycles, too. At home, I tore off a bit of the bread, dabbed some butter on it, and collapsed on the futon to watch some TV. The remote was on the desk, three feet away. To hell with it. I just watched the rain on the window instead.

The one where I got shot down by Uncle Sam

2010-02-06T09:42:00.000+09:00

Something outside a butcher's shop. I've reached the point that I'm over-saturated with knowledge about Korea. I was just curious enough to take the photo, but not curious enough to go inside and ask the proprietor what the steaming pot outside is for.
--------------------------------

Very few people who come to Korea to work plan to stay here long term. My intention was to work here for two years at the most then go back to the States. However, jobs in the States were not plentiful at the time due to the obstructionist Republican congress in those days, and jobs in Korea were very easy to come by. Be that as it may, for ten years I've been looking for jobs back in America though without success so far. The job interview aspect is daunting since American companies are loath to use online interview formats; they often insist on face-to-face interviews, and with me on the other side of the Pacific Ocean, that's just not feasible. An old schoolmate gave me a lead on a federal jobs site that seemed really good, if not for long-term positions, at least something to get my foot back in the door of the United States. However, that has failed. This email arrived this morning:

Mr. Raymond,
The basic requirement for applying for U.S. Federal government positions is that you must have resided in the United States or its protectorates for the last three years.
If you have not, you will not be found eligible for consideration. The hiring officials will not waive this requirement.

So another road back home is closed. Let's just hope the bridge isn't washed out, too!

The one where V and C got married

2010-01-28T01:17:00.000+09:00

Tonight was my first Second Life wedding. It was late, starting at a quarter to midnight, but for the groom in Australia, it was even later. The bride was in China, so a little earlier for her. They have been members of our English chat group for a long time and finally tied the knot. I gave them a couple of Adirondack chairs as a wedding gift. The officiant was the head of our group who was in Japan. The guests came from all over.

Also today, I got to have a long text chat session with an old high school classmate of mine! It was fantastic to have somebody to talk with about the old days. So many names I had forgotten over the last [insert geologic age here].

The rain tonight seems to herald a warming trend, but not sure how long it will last. Could spring be just around the corner already, a month early?

The one where I counted the years

2010-01-17T11:38:00.001+09:00

A Norman Rockwell moment on a frozen part of the river yesterday.

This year will mark thirteen years of my life living in Korea. In some way, the number thirteen is appropriate in my reflections on all that I have done and has been done to me while away from my homeland. When a person comes to a foreign country, adjusting to the new culture will take some time. If you talk to expats in Korea, you might get the impression that none of us ever really adjusts to Korean culture. You would be only partially right. There is a point to which we will adjust and comply with cultural norms here, but we usually don't go beyond that point. The line drawn in the kimchi is different for each of us, though, and sometimes those who are willing to go further look condescendingly on those of us not willing to go as far. When dealing directly with Korean people, we all try not to be offensive; we take off our shoes in those places where it is expected, we bow when appropriate, we defer to elders, we pass objects with both hands when possible, we sit on the floor at restaurants, we don't take off our shirts in hot weather, we don't let others pour their own drinks, and we try not to get rice in the common soup bowl at table. Korean culture is beautiful when observed, and once you become accustomed to it, it becomes a beautiful part of your life. It has a positive effect on your self-esteem. Despite that, though, we are not Korean. We were not nursed from birth in all the sensibilities of the culture. As in all cultures, there is the deep and invisible force of something no outsider can grasp. A look in the eye may mean nothing to a foreigner while to a native, it conveys profound significance. There is one word, a question word, that escapes the outsider's lips at times, that expresses his or her frustration or simple wonder at the behavior of the Korean people. That word is "why". It is just a question, and we wouldn't ask the question if we didn't care about the answer. Trying to understand is honorable, even if the answer eventually proves inadequate. To ask "why" is what we expats have done all our lives, not just here in Korea. Trying to find meaning and reason in the face of perplexity is valuable to us. If we can find peace of mind by asking "why", then so be it. Encourage us. Help us. But please don't beleaguer us with disdain.

The one where I mention Skype

2009-12-31T00:17:00.000+09:00

The ROTC boys took me out to dinner our last day of the course. Naturally, I chose dalkgalbi. Everyone loves dalkgalbi, especially me! Afterwards, we had a drink at some underground bar near the restaurant, but I was tired and went home after an hour. However, it was great to be surrounded by young people!

Christmas was rather lonely; I stayed home and watched a couple movies. The planned buffet event fell apart with only one other co-worker showing up at the Hilton Hotel's Christmas buffet. It was a pretty bad dinner. Nothing tasted good, plus it cost me $40. Merry Christmas, eh? LOL I did get to Skype two of my sisters. It was late Christmas night for me, but their Christmas morning was just warming up. With Skype I can imagine that I'm actually in their houses. It feels comforting.

The winter re-sit class is going well. I have a fantastic class of eager beavers and most of them are quite willing to participate in activities without any coaxing.

The one where I spent 40 bucks for a bad dinner

2009-12-25T20:58:00.000+09:00

Ah, the goosey-goon, or "Salvation Army" as they say in English. Some will be surprised to learn that in 1979 from Thanksgiving to December 23, I was a Salvation Army bell ringer in Brooklyn and Manhattan. I lived in Queens, and every day the Captain took me, Wes Hughes, and Robert Propert to our various bell ringing sites. My favorite was... well, I hated New York, so there was no fave, but when we were at the Brooklyn courthouse, there was a restroom handy, so I liked being there the most, I suppose. Some stories to tell about that little "holiday".

Christmas has come and pretty much gone. I didn't do all that much today. I had planned to go to the Christmas buffet at the Hilton. So I did, mainly because I felt obliged, but I was also feeling lonely; however, after I got there, I learned that hardly anyone was coming! Drinking parties all over town, it seems, were keeping folks away. I can't drink much anymore, really, despite the big talk LOL, so that doesn't appeal to me. Drinking makes me ill, really uncomfortably ill. I hate felling sick. Anyway, where was I? Oh, yeah, I had dinner with Doug and his girlfriend at the buffet. I'm not going to recommend the Hilton Hotel buffet, and I'm not ever going to go back, but I'm not going to come right out and say it was a god awful waste of $40. Well, yes, I am. It was exactly that. Let's be honest! They had turkey, and lots of other stuff, so I certainly got full. It just wasn't very good considering how much it cost. Maybe they should learn how to make any kind of pie, though. That would help a little. Anything besides those horrible sugar cakes they like so much. Yuck.

That's my tree in the picture. It looks pretty in real life, but in this photo it looks like crap! No presents, though. :(

Merry Christmas anyway to one and all. I hope you have a great day and live to see the new year! LOL

The one where I show off my mouse

2009-12-18T09:43:00.000+09:00

Can you guess which one is the new mouse? The nice thing about the new mouse is that it has no wheel. You do all the scrolling and page turning by running your fingers along the surface. Apple made something that was not only useful but is truly intuitive... for once!

Yesterday morning at 8 AM we had a foreigner faculty meeting to discuss new books and how the courses might be set up for next semester. Though there were some important matters, some stuff could not be addressed since the department hasn't created the master schedule for next semester yet, and we don't know how many of the 20 new teachers are actually going to show up in February.

I am interviewing the last of my students today, then a makeup listening test, and then I will have everything I need to finish the raw grading. I downloaded a PDF from the internet that explains how to do Excel spreadsheets. I asked for help at the uni, but nobody understood what I wanted, so I'll persevere and do it myself. We all have exactly the same 5 categories to include in our grading. I have all the raw scores notated for each of the 5 categories and just need to insert equations for the weight of each category so Excel can pop out the magic number at the end. Should be simple, but a template would have been nice to speed things up. My office computer has Vista Home Basic, and I don't have Excel on it$ The university system is in Korean, and Home Basic doesn't do multiple languages (and can't be forced to), so uploading the uni system spreadsheet to my office computer is impossible. I will have to use the head office computers. I have been a nervous wreck this week worrying about missing deadlines, forgetting to do things (which I have done already), figuring out how to organize the portfolio they started making us do, recording grades correctly, entering them into the system, and finishing up interview testing. I have had a continual headache and stomachache for over five days now. Some of the stuff is absolutely stupid, though, considering we teach conversation courses. These should be pass/fail, since there is no valid way to test whether a student has actually learned to converse better having attended class for 1,300 minutes (I'm being generous here!). We basically grade learners on how well they speak in general, not on whether they have improved over the semester. Indeed, how can we know whether they have improved since it takes a while to figure out their level of competence in the first place? Some students tank the placement test to ensure a high grade. Pass/Fail is the only fair way to construct these conversation courses. Some teachers give their learners even LESS instruction time since they have two weeks of midterms and two weeks (or more) of finals! So the learners sit in a class of 25 for 1,100 -1,300 minutes over the course of 16 weeks, which means IF each student gets an equal amount of attention, 4 minutes each class, he gets 50 minutes or so of the teacher's instructive attention over the course of 16 weeks. And then we have to assign a letter grade to him. Beyond the pale, if you ask me. If someone can rationally defend the current grading scheme, I'd love to hear it. I think it is so unfair considering the subject we teach as to be borderline unethical.

The one where I'm not cooking with gas

2009-12-06T18:19:00.001+09:00

The other day my landlady came by to see what I was whinging about regarding the city gas service to my apartment. I told her the gas wasn't flowing regularly, smoothly, through the line. She called the Rinnai A/S (service department) who promptly concluded that the gas range was too old and needed replacement at her expense. She seemed to think that was reasonable and ordered a new range (top). I thought that since she was being so gullible, I might try to convince her that foreigners like ovens and maybe she should buy a new oven for me instead. No go. But it was worth a try. So the service guy shows up with the new range top, and I show him how the gas is behaving, so he gets on the phone to tell his office that it's not a problem with the range.

This is the guy in my kitchen calling his office.
(Yes, I take photos of all service people who come to my house. I don't know why exactly, but there it is! -- Who are you calling insane? LOL)

So he told me that it's the gas meter that is obviously malfunctioning, and he'll have the landlady call for an appointment with the city gas company. Voila! I now have to be home supposedly at 3 PM Monday, but I know that as soon as I make a quick 9 AM trip to the university, I'll get a phone call from the gas guys asking where I am. If I stay home all day, they won't show up until 5 PM. It's a subsection of Murphy's Law called the Korean Clause.

I've done some cooking! Take a look:

This is a batch of corn bread cooked in a caste iron pot in my toaster oven (hence the uneven browning). I like to put hot milk in it and eat it like a cereal for breakfast. It's a good batch.

This is a meat pie I made with chicken, potatoes, and fried onion inside. The pastry turned out really nice, but I had to camp in front of the toaster oven most of the time to make sure it didn't burn! *sigh* I wish the landlady would've agreed to a real oven. She'll let me buy one and install it at my own expense, but that would be a huge hassle come time to move next time. However, if I don't plan on moving, what's the big deal, Michael? Just do it! Do it! Do it now! Yeah, that's what I thought, you wuss.
- - - - - - - -

Hey Grandpa! What's fer supper?

(I know this gets re-posted automatically over on Facebook, but it doesn't format very nicely... sorry for that, but nothing I can do about it.)

The one where I went to a church and wasn't struck by lightning

2009-11-28T22:45:00.000+09:00

This is the big, scary Ferris wheel on the roof of some building in Ulsan. Jon L. and I went to see Kwangsoo's wedding there today. It was at a church, but some generic protestant one. It didn't look like a church, but they called it one, and there are more things to argue with christians about than their choice of architecture. LOL The officiant rambled on and on, then all of a sudden he asked the foreigners to stand up so the congregation could see us! I'm sure he meant well, but Koreans don't seem to realize that we don't always want to be singled out, especially at someone else's wedding, and in a country where anti-foreigner sentiment is growing. After the wedding, we chose to go to Outback instead of the Korean restaurant for the reception. I'm sure the place would've been swamped, and the newlyweds' family and real life friends should get priority.

My Apple Mac iWeb has ceased to publish my other blog. It just stopped suddenly, and I've done all the recommended steps, but it will not publish (upload). I don't know why I bother spending money on Apple Mac. Oh, speaking of spending money... on a Mac... my Bluetooth mouse has gone haywire, so I wanted to replace it, but there are no more replacements. You can only get the new "Magic Mouse". It isn't actually available yet in Korea (of course) but it should arrive next week and they'll send me one as soon as they are in country.

I'm feeling pressured at the university. Our coordinators have made certain that every scrap of pleasure is wrung out of teaching with a string of goal-less robotics to perform for the entertainment of the Korean staff. The only consolation is, it is SO easy to get a teaching job in Korea that changing jobs is a breeze if it gets too complicated here.

The one where I find some canned goods

2009-11-22T20:40:00.000+09:00

I was digging around in the cupboard and came across these two cans that must have been in there for two years (or more?), and disciplining myself not to look at the "best use" dates, I threw together a pastry shell and mixed up a pie. Anyone who's been to my apartment knows that I only have a little electric toaster-style oven that doesn't heat evenly or consistently. However, the result is not that bad. The pie cooked thoroughly, which is important with expired canned goods, I suppose. This piece here I ate while it was still warm. No side effects, yet, but it's only been a few minutes. (If I die in the night, tell the coroner to question the pie! LOL)

In other news, I did not leave the house at all today!
OMG, is that right? Not at all?
I guess it's true, because I just read it on the internet!
LAMOLJ*

Joel told me about this "great sci-fi series" called Torchwood. I downloaded season one. It's so bad I want to cry, but it is starting to grow on me, like a fungus or something. I'm downloading season two now. Someone stop me!

*laughing at my own lame joke

The one where I'm disconnected

2009-11-20T10:34:00.000+09:00

I can't get enough of traditional Korean architecture! It's a complicated and intricate weave that produces an aesthetic to knock your socks off. I would love to have a house like the building in this photo, even without all the detail painting.

Last night the internet service to my place went down, and all my prayer and fasting couldn't bring it back up again. From my office today I gave KT a call, and they'll send someone around tomorrow morning. Eh, it'll give me some quiet time. Speaking of which, my apartment is all rearranged for winter now. The living room is functioning once again as a living room rather than a cat habitat, and the little room that was the computer room is now my meditation room. It's a perfect place: small and cozy. The ondol heats the floor just right in there, too.

This week my syllabus called for giving my classes outlines of the final exam! Is that right? Isn't it too early for that?! The end of the semester is indeed just around the corner. I dread the paperwork, though the classes are all a pleasure to teach. We will actually finish the textbook this time! Thank planning and good learners for that!

Today is the dedication of the new building on campus and the enshrinement (?) of some dead monk. Not sure what enshrinement is, but the university wants all free faculty to attend. I might go, though Friday is a high-pressure day for me. We'll see.

The one where I diss my Mac again

2009-11-08T16:54:00.000+09:00

I am such a child. Toys! Toys! Toys! This Bluetooth headset has been lying around on my desk at the house for a couple months, no, make that several months, and today I came across it by accident and decided to do something with it. The booklet is long gone, but it was written in Korean anyway, and Korean is confusing enough without the added hurdle of technical mumbo-jumbo. So, it was trial and error as I struggled to connect it to my home computers. I tried the Mac first, but of course, Macs aren't very intuitive, so I tried my HP desktop replacement laptop. Zing! Connected instantly. Back to the Mac. I fiddled with this and that, tried some of these and those, and finally I got a screen that seemed like the one I needed. "What is your device?" asked Mac. "Bluetooth headset" I naively typed back. "Hmm, sorry, but there is no Bluetooth headset anywhere near here." Hmm. Mac is blind, I thought. But I already knew that. Then I noticed it, an option for "Any Device" and tried it. Voila! Mac said "I found a Bluetooth headset!" I threw my slipper at him, but being a machine, he simply rolled his unseeing eyes and finished the connection. So, wow, it's an emotional moment for me. I love technology. It does work with Skype, and that makes it quite useful. Hands free, I can walk around the apartment talking to people thousands of kilometers (or even miles) away.
In other tech news, I also got a program to help me stream audio online, but I'm waiting for the creator to come online and help me with the thing. It, too, is for a Mac, and it, too, is not intuitive. I'm sending a letter to Apple Computers. Their new Mac motto should be, "If you're an experienced computer geek, have we got an intuitive machine for you!"

The one where I found Queen Grimhilde's orchard

2009-11-01T19:51:00.000+09:00

Yesterday was a beautiful, warm, sunny day! After some letter writing was caught up, off to the local mountain for a hike I went. Along the way, I passed a lovely little apple orchard, and the devil inside thought no one would miss one apple, would they? Fortunately, before my soul came into jeopardy, this sign came into view. I knew every word on this sign, but what did it mean? Let's first see what the basic vocabulary says: <<Warning apple poison insertion responsibility (particle indicating uncertainty) is not>> It is a sign after all, and sometimes signage is in shorthand. Also, Korean avoids pronouns like the plague. "If you can't guess who's doing what, then you can't speak Korean yet." *sigh* Honestly, I cannot tell you what this sign means precisely, but I can tell you that the presence of the phrase "poison insertion" was enough to keep me honest. LOL

The weather has taken a turn toward winter now. I doubt we'll see days like yesterday again until March. My ondol under-floor heating is running on low, and the humidifier is billowing faithfully. Buttoned up snug, the cats and I are settling in for a cozy evening of a good book, French radio from Canada, and hot store-bought apple juice that I pretend is cider.

The one where the gas lady tried to get in

2009-10-29T22:13:00.000+09:00

Since my body has been ravaged by some viral whatsit all week, my trips to the corner store have included a look at the vitamin drinks they proffer. This looks like an energy drink, but I'm not so sure I feel lucky enough to get it!

Today there was a notice on the front door of our building that the gas lady would be by this morning between 11 and 12. Her job is to come alone into strangers' apartments with a meter and make sure there are no gas leaks inside the apartments. Well, that wasn't enough notice for me to clean the apartment, so I've been dodging her (she comes back at night if you aren't home in the day). I wasn't home during the day, because I spent a good chunk of time at the university trying to catch up on correcting midterms. There were no classes at the uni today, thank goodness. My illness has taken away my vim; I could not have done teaching and stayed upright, I fear. I did get to help one of my co-worker's students, though, which is always a nice feeling. One time in college, my French professor, Colonel Olsen, helped me with an assignment for Miss Gulick, our other French professor. I bothered him at home while he was in his bathrobe. I've never forgotten that, and I have always aspired to be that kind of language teacher, willing to help even if I'm busy.

The one where I suffer my yearly cold

2009-10-26T10:17:00.000+09:00

Casually walking through Seoul, there's no telling what you might see. I guess they lifted the ban on American GIs going out at night and getting wasted, eh? I walked by an hour later, and he was still passed out, but a lot more people were taking his picture! LOL Anyway, this photo kind of looks how I feel: Blecky!

I started getting sick on Thursday, but didn't feel it in earnest until Friday, then this weekend it's only gotten worse. It isn't the flu; it's a cold. And I have tried to be so careful! Argh! I have not been sick at all since last October! Maybe going through homework papers and licking my fingers to turn pages once in a while wasn't a good idea. Bad habit. Time to buy a sponge. Fortunately, my schedule allows an extra day to recover before my classes start again for this week.

What's waiting on my desk: Midterm tests that need grading! And recording! And photocopying for the required portfolio! The only drawback to teaching is the paperwork that must be done. The paperwork has increased each year in the two I have worked here. Hope the trend plateaus somewhere soon. I can understand grading and keeping grading sheets, but this new portfolio thing is over the top. Plus, we need to do spreadsheets! English teachers doing spreadsheets like some science department? There's no reason articulated for the spreadsheets, of course, just some wild demand from the head office. Of course, the university system only operates smoothly with Microsoft Office spreadsheets, and I can't afford MS Office, so I use OpenOffice. Can't get that to work at all. Our local computer nut's directions don't work, because I have Vista Home Basic in my office, and that system is too basic and won't allow dual languages. What a mess. We're just adjuncts according to the university, not real faculty, so why all the fuss? They haven't announced whether they are rehiring us or not. Better get another job lined up just in case. Koreans are so unpredictable; you can't assume anything here.

Time for another Nyquil capsule (I have a stash I brought from the States last summer.)

Aaaaagh.......... |:(

The one where I reflected on a dixie cup

2009-10-17T21:55:00.001+09:00

This was today's reminder of the Korean motto: "Make do." On the bus to Daegu, the light over the door was housed in a dixie cup. Every day, I am surrounded by little things like this, things that I've grown accustomed to, but every once in a while, it dawns on me that they aren't proper. They're half-ass and sometimes dangerous; but after so much for so long, you simply don't see them unless you're stuck on an airless bus with nothing to do but look around.

You know it's autumn when they stop running the air circulation on the buses. Koreans believe that if cold air blows on them, they will get sick. However, in the summer, they will not only sit but often sleep with the A/C blowing on them, and the summer A/C temps are colder than the weather outside in autumn! I just don't get them. I don't think I get them at all. I have so little patience for ignorance.

As for the time I spent in Daegu, I did not find the XBox game Fallout 3 anywhere in Daegu, not even at the XBox kiosk in the electronics mall. I went to several of the large stores, also. So I will have to do the eBay thing, I guess. That game is just too fun not to play! LOL Oh, I wanted to download an add-on for Fallout 3 (I'm using a borrowed copy), but I can't get Microsoft XBox points since I am in Korea and I am not a citizen with a citizen's ID number. However, Vaughan got me a code with points, but XBox would not let me redeem the code using my gamer ID. Undaunted, I tried something on a lark, and it worked! I set up a new Windows Live account, and I set up a new XBox ID that was totally Korean, and that was the trick that did it! XBox Live thinks I'm Korean, so it will redeem the codes for the points I need. Yea deception! It's the only way to survive as a foreigner in Korea.

The one where I found butter beans

2009-10-12T21:44:00.000+09:00

As you might have gathered, I've been trying to get to a real supermarket/department store for some time, and today I went to Busan to that end. Actually, I hadn't intended to go, but Rob forgot his phone at my place, and I thought I'd use it as an excuse to go to Busan. The only problem is, I didn't look for what I had intended to look for, because I never looked at my list the whole time, so it was a fairly fruitless trip, though I found canned butter beans and lentils someplace, Lotte Department store, I think. Surprise, surprise! I'll have to look up an interesting recipe to use them in. Don't remember exactly where I was (I get lost in Busan so easily), but I got to watch the Krispy Kreme store make doughnuts. They have their apparatus set up in front of a long window that has the process all explained in Korean on a tape the runs along the bottom of the window. Fun and educational!

The coolest part is the curtain of glaze. This tube fills up a small reservoir that overflows and coats the little buggers as they pass under. The worker pours water into the receptacle vat underneath every so often to help in the recycling of glaze. It reminded me of my job in the kitchen at Asbury College: making doughnuts at some ungodly hour of the night (that they insisted was actually morning-- yeah, right). It wasn't a bad job, though, if you had to work as well as study. I even got praise from the school chef for saving money by mixing leftover batters instead of wasting them.
They tell me it's midterm exam week now. You'd never know really. There's no special scheduling like we did at Hanyang University. So, I'm doing my midterms next week just to give my learners a little treat. I'll tell them that it's to help relieve their schedule some this week, they'll think I'm great for it, and then they'll evaluate me a decent teacher and I can stay! Yea! (When you schmooze students just to keep your job, you know things have gone to the dogs. LOL)

The one where I was the hunter cat

2009-10-10T18:50:00.001+09:00

I was in the pet shop today to play with the puppies and get cat litter. This was on the box of some kind of plaything for cats. The English is so mangled that, even after looking at the diagrams and the pieces, I still can't figure out exactly what it does or how. Are we EFL teachers losing the war despite winning battles in the classroom? Things like this discourage me.

I can no longer find the Whiskas packets of cat food in Gyeongju. I visited the usual places that have sold them in the past, but no luck in the hunt. So, I will have to make a trip to someplace else tomorrow. There are three choices: Gyeongsan, Pohang, or Busan, all within an hour of here. Good opportunity to test the motorcycle I bought from Todd (through John). The steering seems a little wobbly, but the mechanic seemed to think it was OK. Hope he's right. Korean drivers are not known for their attentiveness, patience, or generosity on the road, especially to bikers! LOL

Yesterday's online class in Second Life went well considering it's a completely new time for lessons. It was a lesson designed for beginners, but there were no beginners there, so the learners that did show up let me practice doing a lesson as if to beginners. Sweet.

For the first time this semester, I felt glad to see a week come and go! LOL I don't know why it was such a tough week for me. Friday evening's class was ROTC cadets; they had just finished a long day of some athletic event, and they were literally falling asleep in their chairs. We did a stand up activity, but that didn't help much. The boys were simply exhausted. Watching them nod off made me sleepy, too, and last night I slept the sleep of the just.

The one where I pretend my motorcycle can travel hyperluminally.

2009-10-07T21:28:00.000+09:00

There are things about computers I don't get, I admit it. The basics, yeah, like buying cool hardware and installing it. Buying or stealing cool software and installing it. Removing undesirable stuff, too. But every once in a while there is something that makes me scratch my noodle and wonder about. Take for instance the following screen captures:

Do you notice anything? The one on the left is a screen capture of my computer at the office. It could just as easily be a screen capture of my desktop PC here at home. The one on the right is my HP desktop replacement PC, affectionately known as a lap crusher PC. I got a little more of the background on the HP screen capture, but they are basically shots of the task manager window, both Windows Vista. I go in task manager and close down things if I intend to tax the system with some big application like Second Life or World of Warcraft. Well, maybe you haven't noticed it, but it's a real pain in the arse. The HP task manager window doesn't have any way to close the window except to "End process" under the processes tab. (There is no X in the corner.) It used to have the X in the corner, but I somehow lost it. Now I'm sure there is simply something to tick in some list of files somewhere to get those little buggers back in their corner, but what do you call that stuff in the corner? It will undoubtedly have some specific nomenclature, and with a computer, you really need to know what everything is called in order to hunt down how to fix or destroy it. Tonight I will either sleep the sleep of a victorious computer conqueror, or I will lie in bed for hours wondering.

In other news, the motorcycle I bought from Todd B. is in the shop for a new battery, new tires, and to fix the tachyon readout, or tachometer or whatever it's called. Actually, the guy called and told me it's done, but I was already in my underwear guzzling a Hoegaarden and listening to Keith Olbermann's show, so I'll pick it up tomorrow.

It was windy today. More than usual for Gyeongju. And the sky was totally overcast. Wonder what that's about. Are we in a feeder band?

The one where I was in Ansan for Chuseok

2009-10-05T21:03:00.000+09:00

I hope everyone had a great weekend! For us in Korea, it was a national holiday. I performed my usual pilgrimage to Ansan, a city southwest of Seoul, where I stayed with the Rees family and met a couple other friends while there. It was a gorgeous weekend, though back home tonight there is a definite chill. The electric heating pad is on very low, and as soon as the cats discover that, it will take more than pretty words to get them off the bed! LOL

While in Ansan, I discovered something that I had heard about. McDonald's delivers! So here are a couple pictures to prove it:

Here, the delivery boy is checking the map and checking his delivery thingy. Click on the photo to read his back.

McDelivery! LOL That is so funny.

I have had to change my online English lesson time from Monday nights to Friday mornings. That will be great for me. Nights are not my thing. I'm a day person. I can run a lesson from my office desk, and my office mate is off that day, so it won't bother anyone. The only question is, can I get learners to come at that time? We'll find out! LOL There are a lot of people who are learning English, so the lack of a convenient time for some might have put them off. We were not getting many from the New World side of earth due to the timing of lessons. Maybe we can change that.

The One Where I Used the Word 'Bindle'

2009-09-26T15:21:00.000+09:00

Since our Homeplus/Tesco department store is so tiny, they made room a few weeks ago by co-opting the entryway into a sales area and pushing all the lockers outside. If you aren't aware, Korean stores often have lockers for your bags and accessories, I mean lap puppies. So now the local Korean ladies get to stuff their lap puppies into lockers outside in the hot sun. This little guy was really distraught, probably overheated and thirsty, but I learned a long time ago that a foreigner in Korea can lose his job if he raises a stink and it gets back to his employers somehow, so I just leave them alone and hope for the best.

I had a nice chat on the phone with B.C. up in Seoul. They're not traveling for the Harvest Festival holiday next weekend. With this swine flu thing, I suppose they have the right idea. I'm planning on being in Ansan for the holiday. Simon says they have plenty of room for me. Not sure if I should get the half-ton of honey or the quarter ton of ginseng gift boxes. I can wrap whatever I get in a large kerchief and carry it like a bindle... well, then it actually would be a bindle, I suppose! LOL

I had intended to go into the uni to my office today to get some work done. I'm behind sending out pats on the back for this past week's classes. Friday's classes haven't gotten their kudos from me yet! Plus, I try to look at the homework and let them know the major problems I see in it. The ROTC lesson yesterday never materialized, because while I was taking roll, I asked them what their weekend plans were, and then I used what they said as a basis to demonstrate better ways to say those things, and that pretty much became the lesson. We don't have class next week due to Harvest Festival, but I gave them U.S. military ranks to memorize, because we're going to play Army and talk about how to address officers and give commands, etc. when we meet again. Yes, Sergeant Major!

The One Where My Motorcycle Kind of Looked Sexy for a Few Minutes

2009-09-22T20:35:00.001+09:00

Yes, even I must endure the mundane! This is my bike getting its check up and oil change. It occurred to me as I stood waiting how beautiful she is really. Not very strong, but she gets me where I'm going and looks good doing it.

Yesterday morning I discovered my internet was out, but I went off to the uni anyway to putter, kind of believing it would all sort itself out when I came home. But it hadn't. So I ended up on the phone trying to tell the woman my problem with her talking just about as fast as a person can talk without making gibberish. I asked her to slow down, but she didn't. That's when I got pissed and told her to find someone who spoke English. So there I was on hold, and this was the message that came on periodically in a womanly digital voice while I was waiting:

"Now is another inquired call.
One moment, please.
Please wait for a while.
Sorry. Connection is delayed.
It is a lot of inquiring call now.
One moment, please.
Please wait for a while."

How can I recall it word for word? BECAUSE I HAD TO WAIT AND LISTEN TO THIS AD NAUSEAM! My guess is they ran the Korean through a computer translator that produced this masterpiece which they plugged into a (fairly good) voice synthesizer. Anyway, the internet guy who eventually answered kept asking me questions, and when I didn't understand, I could hear him slowly draw in his breath like he was trying not to yell at me, but eventually we got it all worked out and my internet was restored. Nick of time, too, since I had to teach online last night.

The One Where I Don't Go to the Secret Faculty Meetings

2009-09-18T21:11:00.000+09:00

Google Calendar is becoming a better value than Mac's iCalendar, it seems. They've come out with this list of national holidays for various countries that can be added to your Google calendar. I've subscribed to the South Korean one, and it put in all the Korean holidays automatically! Will wonders never cease?

Today was a long day. Finished at 6:30 tonight, but all my classes were good. We did some great practice and learned a lot of new stuff about describing people. Some of them had trouble with their Second Life homework, but we worked most of it out. Linden Labs must be having a bad day or something. I extended their Second Life homework one more week since it is tricky getting used to how things work in world. Some of them had their avatars wear the Dongguk T-shirt I made and gave them. Cool.

I'm having second thoughts about a trip to Gyeonggido tomorrow. I might go, but in the afternoon, maybe. I doubt anyone would ever come here nearly as much as I go up there, and that kind of irks me.

A friend and I were talking about how rigid everything has gotten here... that there's a "grading" scale for our participation in the university, and we foreigners can never get a high grade because we don't even know some of the things we get graded on. I have never been told about faculty meetings for our own department, but we are supposed to go to those to get the points. Apparently we also get graded zero on our devotion to Buddhism, probably because most of us don't find pandering to religious ignorance very useful and partly because we have no idea how to get Buddhism points. Nobody said we had to be Buddhist to work here, but if we aren't Buddhist, it is a mark against us, it seems. Anyway, we chatted about the money in the Middle East might be enough to make the recent rise in anti-foreigner bullshit in Korea something to think about. So I'm thinking.

2009-09-14T18:14:00.000+09:00

We know what this means: festival week. Every Korean university has a "festival" every semester, and it is always at some time during the course of regular classes. Students often expect to be excused for festival if they are working their group's booth, but unfortunately they are not excused from my classes. With the swine flu, you'd think festival would've been canceled, but the flu apparently is something to sneeze at.

My ROTC class was rather small on Friday as several cadets had to be tested for the swine flu. It seems that some cadets actually have it, but I'm not completely sure that is accurate. This morning I went in to the university to work on lesson plans, and there seemed to be more people walking around with face masks on than usual.

I'm teaching tonight online. The lesson is 'humor in English'. I've done this before, but I'm going to introduce puns and oxymorons to them this time. A lot of the jokes are along the lines of "goes into a bar" type stuff. Here's an example:

<< A dyslexic man walks into a ___. >>

What would you put in the space that might be funny?

Any answer would be good use of language skills, but only one answer fits the sentence humorously.

Tomorrow I'm observing a co-worker's class in the morning. We have to observe and report on three separate co-workers throughout the semester. Isn't that so Orwellian? LOL Big Brother will reward me.

The one where I get chastized by a young lady.

2009-08-31T15:14:00.001+09:00

The little sign reads, "Disinfect basket, please." I didn't do mine, since what good would it do in the long run while I'm inside the store. I'll be touching things while shopping. Anyway, I got this picture at a price. Korean stores get hysterical about anyone taking pictures in them, so after snapping the shot, I had to stop and listen to a lecture from a HomePlus employee about not taking pictures in the store. There are two ways a foreigner can react that won't cause trouble. We can play dumb and pretend not to understand what's going on, or we can apologize profusely with a fake reddening of the cheeks and a couple serious bows and saying, "I'm sorry," in the most humble manner. Naturally, I chose the former, because I wasn't really sorry for taking the photo. Why be too hypocritical? LOL Anyway, let the world know that HomePlus/Tesco is doing its part to stop the spread of swine flu!

At work today, I organized a little for this week's classes. It's a light week considering it's the first week, and a drop-add week, but I want the students to have something to do in class all the same. My higher level classes will get their introduction to Second Life this week, because part of their participation grade will come from Second Life activities. I'm toying with the idea of allowing them to have a one-time unexcused absence that can be made up by attending an extra event in Second Life. Naturally, I can't have them absent regularly and making it up in Second Life, but once seems like a fair way to handle it. I hope that one day the university will authorize an entire course called Virtual English or something where I can have a real class of 20 students or so that meet only online in Second Life. That's feasible; lots of universities have Second Life classes. Am I dreaming? Yes, but realities often begin with dreams.

The one where I wondered

2009-08-27T15:42:00.003+09:00

Yesterday while I was hiking on some trails I've never been on before, I came across this. No idea what it is, but now I have you to share my perplexity!

I tried to upload a video response to my friend Simon's hagwon video which I thought was cute, and I kept getting this message:

본인확인제로 인해 한국 국가 설정시 동영상/댓글 업로드 기능을 자발적으로 비활성화합니다.
We have voluntarily disabled this functionality on kr.youtube.com because of the Korean real-name verification law.

So, what this is all about, I have no idea! It's probably a good idea on one level, but like all Korean good ideas, they implement them so badly they end up pissing everyone off in the end.

Sorry, Simon! You'll never know the nice things I said about your students! LOL

At the infirmary on campus today, they took my temperature, 37°, which is normal. Then they stuck a long cotton swab up my right nostril about 2 inches or so to get a sample to test for Swine Flu. Even though anyone visiting my house might conclude that I do indeed suffer from a form of pig disease, I can assure you, it is not the flu. It is just pigstyitis.

The one where I get my new passport

2009-08-17T19:35:00.003+09:00

I got a call on my cell phone today, one of the random times the stupid thing actually rings when someone calls me. It was a Korean guy, and he was babbling as fast as he could in Korean even though I had answered the phone in English. I wasn't quite sure what he was talking about at first, except that it was about a visa ("bee-ja" to be precise). It took a few seconds, but I finally asked him if it was a passport from the US embassy, to which he answered, yes ("neh" to be exact). He wanted to know whether I was home or not, which I was. And as you can see, I have my shiny new passport! They tell me there's a chip or something inside it so that Homeland Security (the KGB that George Bush established) can keep track of me and anyone else that obviously doesn't love America enough to shun foreign travel.

The other day while I was in Ansan visiting friends, Simon loaned me a copy of "Fallout 3".<-- [See note from previous entry] At first, I didn't think I'd like it, but after I got into it, it became really fun to play on the XBox. Unfortunately, nobody told me that when the main quest was completed, the game stops! I had so much I wanted to play yet. Oh well, no sense crying over spilled nuka-cola.

Saturday evening, we had a nice BBQ over at Teddy's place on the deck. It was a composite of Korean and Western style barbecue. Very delicious. The next day, Kyle and I took a trip over to COSTCO for a few items. We also had a disagreement about the Palestinian situation. He thinks that all news reporting on the Israeli-Palestinian problem is totally biased toward Israel. I don't believe that.

On a lighter note, I teach online tonight! The new place we meet in Second Life... I don't feel comfortable at the new place. It's not cozy enough for my style of teaching. However, I obligated myself, so there it is.

The one where I apply for a new passport

2009-08-12T09:43:00.001+09:00

So this is the photo that will be on my passport for the next ten years. After I found the same shop I had had my photo taken at in 1999, I spent $13 for four small photos only to discover later in the lobby of the embassy an automated photo booth that takes legal size/shape photos for $5! Ugh! If I had known that machine was there.... Grrr. Anyway, since the conservatives increased government control of and interference in our lives with the ominous Department of Homeland Security (aka, the KGB), things are different in the passport renewal business. In 1999, I took my old passport in for renewal with a legal size photo and had my new passport within the hour. Now, you have to wait two weeks to get your renewal passport so that the American KGB can collect data on your private activities abroad. They didn't even give me a temporary paper in case the local authorities want to see my passport for some reason. The police can demand to see any foreigner's passport at any time, though they don't usually do that. However, since they can do it, I'd rather err on the side of expecting the worst. I've sat in a Korean police station lock up before, and it's not something I want to do again anytime soon.

Yesterday the dentist pulled out my stitches. Next week I'll go back, and we'll start the arduous process of capping two teeth and building a bridge over the space between them. Sounds fun. At least nobody said "root canal". I don't know what a root canal is, but I do know the very words make grown men quiver and faint, so it is definitely not something I want to go through, being a grown man only on the outside! LOL

Simon loaned me a copy of Fallout 3, an XBox game.<-- [Correction! Simon says he didn't loan it to me. Maybe it was Joel who loaned it.] I started it, and now I'm getting hooked! It has the feel of Oblivion, but with modern clothes and weaponry. If Bethesda came out with more games like this, I'd probably never get any work done!

The one where I went to the Road Bar

2009-08-08T20:34:00.000+09:00

Brett and I went out trying to find something to do a couple days ago, and we came across this sign. Try to guess what the sign means. I'll tell you at the bottom of this post.

After some delicious dalkgalbi, we thought we'd find a movie to watch. I had seen Harry Potter in the States, but I wouldn't have minded seeing it again; however, the movie theater only shows it twice in the early afternoon, so we had missed it. We ended up at the WA Bar, then we went to the Road Bar where two hostesses doted over us all evening in a modified Korean style. Lucky me. LOL

The weather has been crappy for three days now. Yesterday, Brett and I took a drive out to Bulguksa (Buddha Land Temple). I've seen the place probably six times, and even though it's very old, it gets boring after six times. I made some chicken fajita with tortillas for dinner. Since I get up early every day, I was exhausted and left Brett to stay up and watch DVDs or whatever he did all night. He got up at noon today (I have never in all my life been able to sleep til noon no matter what time I've gone to bed. Just not in my nature.) Anyway, he took off to collect his wife and kids at the family farm four hours away. He hasn't answered my text message asking if he got there all right, so better send another. Tomorrow I'm off to Ansan, then Monday I go to the U.S. embassy to renew my passport. I hate going to the embassy. It's worse, literally, than visiting an inmate in prison. I feel so dirty and violated afterward. I've always wondered what it would be like to come from a regular, normal country that doesn't go out of its way to piss off three quarters of the world. *sigh*

I started recording for my podcast experiment today. I got a decent program to help me. I want to marry my classes in Second Life to the podcasts so that learners can prepare for my class as well as do follow-up. The podcasts will always be related to my lesson of the week.

Anyway, for the curious, the sign above probably means "We make coffee one cup at a time." There is no way to be absolutely certain. Why do they bother writing signage in English? The nice answer: It's chic. The correct answer: They're insane.

The one where I show off my new camera

2009-08-05T19:21:00.002+09:00

Yesterday I went to High-Mart to find another Sony Cybershot. My old one was bequeathed to my sister Connie. The old one is still quite good, but it was time to move on. High-Mart only had one of the cameras that I would even think of getting, but the price was WAY too high. However, the clerk did some figuring on his machine and cut the price from 509,000 to 392,000. I expected maybe 10 bucks off, but this was more like 117 bucks off! You can see it here in the photo. Pretty groovy, eh?
Next Tuesday my passport expires, so Monday I'll be in Seoul at the U.S. embassy getting a new passport. That means my dental appointment to pull out my stitches will have to be postponed until Tuesday. The department wants our syllabi posted by Friday, and I haven't even started. The university program doesn't work on my computers at home, so I have to go all the way in the school to use the office computer. Apparently we lose points toward being rehired if we don't post on time. The funny thing is, I have talked to two professors here in two other departments, and they (as Korean professors) don't have a point system. Is it only for the unreliable, lazy, and unprofessional foreigners? Probably, but I stopped caring years ago what Koreans think of us.
On a lighter note, my first class in Second Life since our group moved to the new location went fairly well considering I was hepped up on medicine from the dentist. After a month's absence, it was kind of weird to be teaching online again, but I'll get back in the swing of things soon enough.
My desk chair roller wheels device had broken many weeks ago, and the other day I went and got a new one to put on. I finally figured out how to attach the hydraulic post to the new roller wheels assembly, but I forgot one of the seals, and when I sat on the chair, the hydraulic thing spit out the grease from inside and I lost the pressure that makes the seat go up and down. It's now permanently down. It's usable, but too low. Now I'm working on seeing if I can get a new hydraulic post. Oh, the trials and tribulations.
Tomorrow Brett's coming to visit for a while. Haven't seen him for a long time. I'm cleaning the house ( a little) so he doesn't throw up upon entering my humble den.
Sugar is needier than ever now, and it's getting on my nerves. I feel bad that I resent her and hate to have her around, but it really is driving me nuts that she can't stop jumping on me, following me, meowing CONSTANTLY, and generally annoying me at every opportunity.

The one where I went to Aloha

2009-07-21T21:52:00.000+09:00

This is what happens when you ask some random Joe to take your picture... Be that as it may, that's me on the left and my motorcycle instructors Jessica and Tim. They were excellent! I've been riding in Korea for several years, but I still learned a lot about motorcycles, motorcycle safety and the law. We did a weekend course at the elementary school I attended as a child. Eleven of us started the course, then one guy fell off his bike and damaged his knee, so we were down to ten. All ten of us graduated, and I got a 100% on the course written exam even though I messed up two times on the riding test... a little. The tight U-turns inside a small box were no problem during practice, but as soon as they started testing it, I got nervous.
Yesterday, Bette and Jack and I went up to Aloha, Michigan, where my brother is remodeling a house into a B&B... but not really a B&B. It's more like a French "pension" if you know what that is, a kind of half-ass inn. Anyway, despite three years of work, my brother hasn't completed even enough of the building to allow for habitation of any kind. No water. No sewer. That's the difference between us. I would have completed at least one small section to live in (including water and sewer hookup) then proceeded to work on the rest. Eh, c'est sa vie et pas la mienne! All the same, it was a beautiful day for a lovely drive through the northern woods to Mullet Lake where his new house is. Here's a picture of the house/pension. It's right at the front gate of Aloha State Park.

Chuck and Deanna and their kids Matt and Lacy stopped in on their way up to Copper Harbour. They have a cabin up there in the wilderness of the Upper Peninsula.
My niece's daughter Amber arrived safely on Sunday and is now staying with us. She seems to be getting used to the place quite nicely.

The one where I visited Beverly again

2009-07-16T05:20:00.000+09:00

I went to see my cousin Beverly again today at the nursing home. We watched an episode of The Golden Girls. She seemed happy for the company, and I got a nursing attendant to take our picture. So I ran down to the Rose City drugstore where the photo shop lady helped me print out a hard copy which I put in a frame. Then I ran back up to the home to give the picture to Beverly. She was on her daily oxygen. I brought her and the nursing staff a couple bags of doughnuts and some fig newtons, too. I hope to visit her a couple more times before I have to go back to Korea.
I did a once-over at Wal-Mart for some things I need to take back to Korea: bed sheets, a humongous towel, a couple card games, a board game, and a couple cheap bags for the trip back... other sundries, too.
One thing I'm finding nice but different from Korea is that TV shows start exactly on the hour or half-hour! However, they cram scads of ads in every 4 or 5 minutes, so watching American TV isn't very relaxing. I endure one show (NCIS) but that's about as much as I can tolerate of TV in America!
The Downtown Café lunch special today was grilled turkey on rye with ~~chips~~ french fries-- not very good ones, but OK. There was a painting on the café wall by my mother's old friend Naomi Bunting, but the waitress had no idea whether Naomi is still alive or not. I might try to find out tomorrow. Tomorrow is a motocross at the high school, so I'm going to go out there to watch that. Should be fun. I did stop to look at the high school. The sports field is all shiny and new-looking, but the rest of the facilities I saw were the same as when I went to school there, though somewhat dumpy and dingy.

The one where I go to Rose City

2009-07-15T20:55:00.000+09:00

Yesterday, I decided to go see my cousin Beverly in the nursing home in Rose City then head out to a sports shop in the north woods to get a motorcycle helmet. The car was low on fuel, so I stopped at the gas station. Here's the fuel pump in Rose City. I used the 89 octane button, and that's where that speaker device is located, and I'm not sure if that speaker would have started up had I chosen a different button, but be that as it may, as soon as I pushed the 89 octane button, that speaker started blaring out an advertisement designed such that it sounded like a radio station broadcast... anyway, I nearly dropped the fuel nozzle when it began as it startled the bejesus out of me. I caught Beverly at the tail end of her breakfast, so I chatted with her and the ladies at her table before wheeling her down to her room. We had a nice talk about dad's side of the family. There are pictures on her wall of people I'm supposed to know, I think, but I don't. At the sports shop, the lady helped me choose a nice helmet, and we chatted about the economy and teaching English in Korea. Their store is in the country outside Mio. I made a video of my trip out there. There is so much empty land between towns in Michigan! Stopped in to see Bette and Jack after all that. They're having a time selling that motorhome. Bette made brownies... really fudgey ones! Mmm. Today, I'm off to see Bev again, and I'm taking my new helmet to show her, then we'll take a picture. At the drugstore, you can get prints of pictures off your digital camera, so I'll get a print for her and put it in a frame. They say it might rain this afternoon. I'm hoping to see a thunderstorm before I have to go back to Korea. I miss those.